WWE RAW Results News (Page 9)

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Kevin Federline came to the ring to open the live action. Britney Spear’s husband grabbed a mic and asked if everyone wanted to know why he was back on Raw. He said it was simpe: he wants payback. K-Fed claimed that all the entertainment networks talked all week about how Cena had humiliated him last week.

He said that he wasn’t a loser like the Chicago Cubs and vowed to get his revenge tonight … and he figures to have some help in the form of World Champion King Booker. Booker slowly came to the ring and said that he listened to K-Fed’s CD. He called it a treasure and Federline a pure artist. The King said Cena would pay for his actions. He continued the K-Fed praise by calling him a trend setter, who would set the trend by voting for Cena’s WWE title to be on the line at Cyber Sunday.

At that point, ECW Champion Big Show came to the ring in street clothes and said everyone needs to hold on a second. He said he agrees that Cena’s belt should be up for grabs at Cyber Sunday and that he should be beaten within an inch of his life. However, he disagreed that Booker would win the Champion of Champions match. He said that he was the most dominant athlete in WWE history, and if he didn’t believe him to tune into ECW tomorrow night. A “Cena” chant broke out. Book cried “Balderdash!” Big Show asked what the hell that meant.

They argued over who’d be victorious at the PPV until WWE Champion John Cena showed up and, from the top of the ramp, told us to look at what we’ve got here. He said we’ve got Big Show, Booker T, and Kevin Federline: the dumbest line-up in the history of Celebrity Jeopardy … a big (referring to Show), royal (Book), pain in the ass (K-Fed). Cena addressed K-Fed and questioned his choice of allies, claiming that Show was the Stay-Puft marshmallow man, Jabba the Hut, and the white Fat Albert (mocking his past movie roles by making bogus claims of roles he did not have).

He then addressed K-Fed’s choice of Booker T as an ally, saying that it was all well and good w/ the King gimmick until he called K-Fed’s album a “treasure.” Cena said that Booker had officially lost his status as a black man. Ron Simmons then showed up and said, “Damn,” before walking away. Cena turned back to K-Fed and said that he’d have better luck playing with himself (rather than “Playing with Fire,” the title of K-Fed’s album) than getting revenge on the Champ.

Match 1: Melina vs. Mickie James
- James went for the Mickie DDT, but Melina countered and hit a modified swinging neckbreaker. James came back with a hurricanrana and hit her signature DDT for the win. Mickie advanced to the finals at 3:48.

Match 2: Chris Masters and Shelton Benjamin vs. Carlito and Intercontinental Champion Jeff Hardy
- The finish came when the faces had some confusion follow their attempt at a double-team, which led to Carlito getting rolled up by Shelton for the 1, 2, 3. Benjamin and Masters defeated Hardy and Carlito at 4:23. After the match, Carlito and Hardy argued until Masters and Benjamin started a brawl with them that led to the faces standing tall in the ring.

Backstage, Todd Grisham interviewed Edge and Randy Orton. Edge called Grisham “Re-Todd,” and talked about how typical it was for DX to do what they did last week. Orton said they won’t lay down for DX like others have, and that as the two biggest superstars in the industry, he and Edge will get the job done and defeat DX. Edge said that Eric Bischoff, The Coach, and Vince McMahon will be at ringside for the Orton-Trips match tonight.

Backstage, Johnny Nitro and K-Fed were hanging out and talking trash about Cena. Nitro said K-Fed was a better rapper and actor than Cena, but tonight Johnny would show the world that he’s a better wrestler than Cena.

Match 3: Johnny Nitro (w/ Melina and Kevin Federline) vs. WWE Champion John Cena
- Cena went wild after a lengthy beatdown, connecting on a series of diving shoulder tackles and clothesline, followed by the Prototype spinning back drop. He then motioned that K-Fed “couldn’t see him” and connected on the Five Knuckle Shuffle and the FU. Cena defeated Nitro at 6:33.

After the match, Cena went after K-Fed as he backed up the ramp. Booker and Big Show came out and beat Cena back to the ring before the champ could get his hands on K-Fed. Book slammed Cena’s face into the ring steps and then drilled him with a hard running clothesline. Big Show gave him the chokeslam, as Federline taunted him from the ramp. Booker T then gave Big Show the Book End and Cena the Axe Kick.

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* WWE RAW opens with Edge and Randy Orton coming to the ring dressed as DX (Edge as HHH, Orton as Michaels), cutting a promo on HHH and Shawn Michaels and on the fans for buying DX merchandise. This leads to DX hitting the ring. Orton challenges HHH to the main event.

* Cryme Tyme debuted, defeating two members of the Spirit Squad (non-title bout) using a TKO/neckbreaker combination. Spirit Squad began arguing and fighting amongst themselves after the match.

* Jonathan Coachman was speaking to King Booker backstage when Cryme Tyme came into the scene. Booker told them he doesn't speak ebonics.

* WWE Intercontinental champion Jeff Hardy won a Four Way over Shelton Benjamin, Chris Masters, and Super Crazy, pinning Masters with the swanton.

* Backstage, Vince McMahon approached King Booker and Big Show, asking where John Cena was and teasing his big announcement.

* Melina and Johnny Nitro promised they had a big celebrity and brought out Kevin Federline. That got the most heat of anything thus far on the show.

Cena came out and rapped about Federline, then knocked Nitro out of the ring. Big Show and Booker T both came out, which saw them go back and forth on the mic. Vince McMahon came out and announced at Cyber Sunday, the fans would have the ability to decide which of the titles would be on the line. Cena asked Federline which title he wants to see defended and ends up giving him the F-U, which got a huge reaction.

* Rob Conway came out and complained about not being used. Carlito came out and squashed him.

* Later, McMahon toldthat Edge & Orton they'd face DX, presumably at Cyber Sunday.

* Steve O and another cast member from MTV's Jackass came to the ring and said they were willing to take on anyone. Umaga came out and destroyed them.

* Maria won a Four Way Bra & Panties match against Torrie Wilson, Victoria, and Candice Michelle to advance in the WWE Women's championship tournament.

* The Tournament Semi-Finals are Maria vs. Lita and Melina vs. Mickie James.

* Triple H pinned Randy Orton after a chairshot and Pedigree. It appeared Orton injured his foot early as they were stalling. A trainer and referee came to ringside to help Orton walk back to the locker room.

** Click here for more WWE photos from this week's RAW

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John Cena welcomed us all to the season premiere of WWE RAW. He said it felt good to say that the champ was still here despite all the crap he had to go through with Edge.

World Heavyweight Champion King Booker’s music hit and he came out to the ring with Queen Sharmell following closely behind. He asked Cena if he remembered the last time he was on RAW he made him kiss his feet.

Booker and Cena began to circle it up when ECW World Champion Big Show’s music hit and he came down to the ring.

Big Show said he was the champion of champions. He said we had a white guy talking like he was black and a black guy trying to talk like a white guy. He said there was only guy here who said what he said he was. Cena said he was wrong because no one ever called him the Michelin man. He said he was the most dominant giant in WWE history and the most dominant champion in this ring.

Cena said this whole champion of champions thing was up in the air so why not just settle it right now. He jumped Big Show, but Booker clocked him from behind. Show hit both with a big boot, sending both champions reeling. The referees took off down to the ring to break up the fight.

Loser Leaves RAW: Kane vs. Umaga
- The two started off exchanging blows in the middle of the ring. Kane got the upper hand and worked Umaga into the corner and planted him with a follow up clothesline. Umaga retaliated relatively quickly, laying Kane out with a lariat of his own.

Kane blocked the spike and went for the choke slam. Umaga fought out of it only to get caught in a sidewalk slam. Kane mounted the top rope and hit his flying lariat before turning his attention to Estrada on the outside. Umaga recovered relatively quickly and flattened Kane with a Samoan spike, getting the cover for the win.
Winner: Umaga via pin fall

DX was standing behind a podium. HBK said as a result of their actions last week they would be forced to apologize to the following people: the tag team division. HHH pointed out there wasn’t much of a tag division to begin with. The Spirit Squad we apologized to and made fun of. They kept throwing out their cards on all their apologies before stopping at Edge. HBK pointed out they hadn’t apologized to anyone yet. They said they’d beat the hell out of Cade and Murdoch tonight in a street fight but couldn’t apologize for it because it hadn’t happened yet. HBK didn’t realize they were on live TV. HHH asked him what they were going to do and HBK whipped out some merchandise and plugged it before giving us a ‘suck it’.

Jeff Hardy vs. The Big Show
- Hardy came right at the ECW champ, but was quickly tossed aside. Show followed him to the corner and planted him with a big chop before tossing Hardy like a frisbee out of the corner. He ripped Hardy’s shirt in the opposite corner chopped him and then stood on him near the apron.

Hardy fought back with some punches before he got clocked with a huge clothesline. Hardy flailed away with some punches and a drop kick to the knees before hanging Show’s head on the ropes and connecting with whisper in the wind.

Hardy hit a swanton bomb but Big Show kicked out in a big way. Hardy went to whip him into the ropes but Show caught him in the cobra clutch back breaker before hitting the showstopper for the victory.
Winner: The Big Show via pin fall

Johnny Nitro popped up out of nowhere and railed away at Hardy before Big Show showed up and hit the back breaker on Nitro before tossing him to the side like a rag doll.

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DX’s music hit and Triple H and Shawn Michaels came out to the ring. Triple H shushed the crowd momentarily. He said he was serious, he had a question that needed answering. He asked the fans “are you ready”? He said a picture was worth a thousand words and showed a picture of Mr. McMahon’s head stuffed in Big Show’s backside. They did the “suck it” routine before HBK took the mic and was interrupted by Coach.

He ordered both of them to compete right here, right now in a Texas Tornado match against six other opponents. Cade & Murdoch were one team, The Highlanders were another, and the last was Viscera and Charlie Haas.

Texas Tornado Tag Match: DX v. Cade & Murdoch v. The Highlanders v. Charlie Haas & Viscera
- Visc and Haas double-teamed Triple H, missing a coordinated splash attempt. Cade turned Rory inside out with a big stiff lariat. Eventually, DX and Viscera ended up alone in the ring. DX hit a nice double DDT before t-ing up Charlie Haas with a big spine buster and an HBK elbow. Michaels hit sweet chin music and as Haas bobbled back, Triple H hit the boot to the gut and the pedigree for the win.
Winners: DX via pin fall

Coach came out and told the folks to stop the music. He said he ran the show and he ran Monday night. Triple H asked if he could throw his ass off the ramp and then he and Michaels would run the show. DX chased Coach to the back as we went to commercial.

WWE Intercontinental Championship: Johnny Nitro v. Jeff Hardy
- Nitro started off with a kick to the gut and a hard uppercut to the face of Hardy. Nitro kicked Hardy off his feet before whipping him into the ropes and getting caught with a neck breaker. Hardy hit a leg drop to the groin before following up with a hurricanranna out of the corner.

The action went back and forth when Nitro scooted out to the ring apron, but Hardy caught him and tossed him back in the ring. He springboarded off the top rope and got a unique roll up that got a two count. Hardy connected next with a whisper in the wind which got him an even closer two count.

Nitro split to the outside and as Melina tended to him, Hardy came off the top rope and planted Nitro into the mat. Hardy quickly pressed his advantage, looking to hit his red cross off the guardrail, but Nitro avoided it.

They both ended up on the top rope. Nitro attempted a flip power bomb, but Hardy threw him off. The challenger immediately took advantage hitting the Swanton bomb on Nitro and gaining the pinfall for the victory and the Intercontinental Championship.
Winner and NEW WWE Intercontinental Champion: Jeff Hardy

Coach was on the phone with Vince McMahon. He said there wasn’t any way he could possibly run WWE RAW like him and that he couldn’t even get out of his locker room. Coach said something then hung up before peaking outside to see if the coast was clear. He crept around the back cautiously before stopping and staring with eyes wide open at Triple H who was there with his arms crossed. He turned the other way and saw HBK staring at him smiling. They played some cheesy okay coral music before sprinting into the women’s locker room. DX decided to go in and asked where Coach went. Triple H tried to talk to the WWE Divas, but Shawn tracked him down and made him come along.

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- Lita defeated Candice Michelle with Edge as a special guest referee in Round 1 of the WWE Women's Title Tournament. Lita introduced Edge as the special guest referee. Edge checked both Candice and Lita for any foreign objects. When the bell rang, Edge hit Candice with a Spear and Lita covered her. Just as Edge counted the "3," John Cena hit the ring and took out Edge.

- Back live, John Cena gets on the mic and says Edge tried to knock the power out because he didn't want to fight him. Edge tells Cena to shut up and that he will probably take credit for the power coming back on now. Cena said the fans want to see him kick his ass. Edge mocks the fans when they answer back and he said they wouldn't be taking place tonight because he would invoke his re-match close on his own terms. Cena then started making slut jokes about Lita. Lita said she is a human being and those jokes hurt.

She calls Cena a joke and how everyone in the locker room thinks he is a bad wrestler. Lita says Edge is a better wrestler than Cena and adds that even she is better. Edge then challenged Cena to face Lita tonight with one arm tied behind his back. Cena accepted and Edge calmed down Lita who didn't like the idea.

- Clips of WWE in Mexico were shown.

- Kane defeated Johnny Nitro via DQ in a WWE Intercontinental Championship Match; Nitro retains. The match finished when Umaga hit the ring with Kane having Nitro setup for a Tombstone Piledriver. Umaga hit Kane over the back with a steel chair and then hit his head with a huge charge in the corner.

- Backstage, Shawn Micheals was reading the new WWE Magazine when Triple H walked up. He mentioned the article about Triple H and how he managed to talk about Hulk Hogan, Ultimate Warrior, the Madison Square Garden incident and more. Triple H reminded him he talked about his different choices of facial hair as well. Michaels complained there was no advertisements for DX gear in the magazine. Both did the cheesy plug for WWEShop.com where you can buy all your DX gear.

Maria walked up and asked them about the Gauntlet later tonight. Triple H said they had two words for Coach and the crowd finished it. Maria said she didn't catch that. Triple H whispered into her ear. She said she still didn't get it. Triple H tried to offer a "visual aid" by starting to pull down his trunks when Michaels pulled him back and they left. Eugene walked up and said hi to Maria. Maria said DX just told her to "suck it." Eugene rolled his eyes into the back of his head and fell over.

- Backstage, The Coach approached Shelton Benjamin who was with Torrie Wilson and her dogs. Coach asked Benjamin why he tried to embarss him last week by saying he was overlooked in WWE because he was a black man. Coach said Benjamin never captializes on his opportunites. Benjamin reminds him that he is a former three-time Intercontinental Champion. Coach said Benjamin shouldn't accuse McMahon of discrimination since Martin Luther King Jr. was his hero. They continue to argue when Jeff Hardy walks up trying to be black (and it wasn't funny).

Coach booked the two in a match later tonight. Edge and Lita then walked into Coach's office. They brought up Cena accepting a match with Lita tonight with one arm tied behind his back. Coach made it a No Holds Barred Match, but said Edge couldn't lay a finger on Cena and if he did, he would lose his re-match for the title.

- John Cena teaming with Batista & Bobby Lashley against King Booker, William Regal & Finlay on Friday Night Smackdown this week is plugged.

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The show opened with Lillian Garcia introducing the new WWE Champion, John Cena.

Cena came out to the usual mixed reaction, w/ the Montreal crowd heavily booing the new champ. JR and King gave Edge credit for his performance last night, but also hyped Cena’s resilience in winning a match he’d never previously taken part in. Cena grabbed a mic and looked around at the anti-Cena crowd that was booing him. He laughed off the haters, but finally managed to say that he was in the midst of chaos (referring to the crowd). He said that normally he’d say that tonight would be huge, but tonight he really wasn’t himself. The crowd didn’t let up, continuing to heavily boo him. Cena continued, saying that the bottom line was that he was hit in the head a lot last night. He said everything was starting to become clear, though, and he now could finally say that, low and behold, the champ is here. Cena said that no matter what the crowd thought, his win last night was big.

Cena said that after all that has happened in the last nine months during his feud with Edge, the story was finally over. The crowd was chanting “Boring” at that point, but they erupted when Edge (w/ Lita) came walking down to the ring. Edge walked with a noticeable limp and a bandaged elbow. Upon entering the ring w/ a mic, he asked Cena if he believed all the crap he was talking. He said Cena’s win last night was a fluke just like the rest of his career, and when he used his rematch clause, he’d win his third WWE title. Cena told him to listen, telling him that last night he saw fire and hunger that he’d not previously seen from him…and he respects Edge for that. The crowd chanted “Cena Sucks,” as Cena said that if Edge wanted to talk the way he was talking right now, he had one of two options. A) He could have a live sex celebration and screw himself. B) He could challenge him for the WWE title right now. Edge said that he didn’t have a desire to win the title back in Montreal…which he said was not apart of Canada. He said that last night he took more physical punishment than most people took in their entire lives. An FU thru two ladders? Most people would’ve given up, but he didn’t.

Thus, he said he’d take his title back whenever he wanted, but not tonight. Cena said it took Edge 30-seconds to turn on Edge and favor Cena kicking his ass. The Champ said that he was just as beat up as Edge and asked the former champ what he wanted. Edge said he wanted payback for the worst night of his life, in which he lost his match in his hometown, w/ his mom in attendance…plus the WWE title. Cena told him to call the wambulance. Edge told him to shut up, at which point Cade and Murdoch showed up and leveled the champion. The three heels then took turns stomping away at the champ…Well, that is until DX showed up! Edge took off, as DX took out Murdoch and Cade. The Coach then made his way out to the top of the ramp and made a six-man tag between Cena/DX and Edge, Murdoch, and Cade. Triple H gave Cena a bunch of nasty looks.

Backstage, Coach addressed the McMahons and told them that a lot of stars wanted to tell them how sorry they were that they lost last night. Shelton Benjamin was up first, and he told Mr. McMahon that if he’d been his partner last night instead of Show, they wouldn’t have lost last night. He asked why McMahon didn’t choose him? Shelton concluded that it was because he was black.

Match 1: Umaga (w/ Armando Alejandro Estrada) vs. Kane
- The two traded shoulder tackles to start the match, but neither would fall. Thus, they began trading punches…that is, until, Umaga caught Kane w/ a belly-to-belly suplex. AAE, meanwhile, fetched a chair. The ref bumped soon after when AAE tried to hand the chair to Umaga. Kane splashed both Umaga and the ref in the corner. The Big Red Machine followed by giving the Samoan Bulldozer a DDT. With the ref down, Umaga eventually blasted Kane right in the face with the chair. He made the cover, but during the time it took to get a new ref, Kane recovered and was able to kick out.

Back from the break, Kane was hammering away at Umaga, but the undefeated monster came back with a Samoan Drop. He then connected on a modified Flatliner. Kane backed up into the corner, allowing Umaga to charge for a running hip smash. Unfortunately for Umaga, Kane got up and hit a reverse elbow. Kane followed with two clotheslines, but Umaga wouldn’t fall. It took a running shoulder tackle to get Umaga to fall, but Umaga quickly came back and threw Kane over the top rope. Kane landed on the apron and hung Umaga’s neck across the top rope. With Umaga reeling, Kane grabbed the chair and came back into the ring. Umaga blocked his attempt to use it, though. Kane stayed on the offensive with a big boot and flying clothesline from the top rope. Instead of going of the chokeslam to finish it, though, Kane drilled Umaga three times in the head with that steel chair. Umaga defeated Kane via DQ at 8:10.

Maria waved hello to Vince and told him that she’d been watching his DVD and was waiting to get to the good part. She got him confused w/ former Bears QB Jim McMahon. The Spirit Squad interrupted her and apologized for his loss last night. Johnny dedicated his upcoming match with Ric Flair to Vince.

Match 2: Ric Flair vs. Johnny (w/ the Spirit Squad)
- Johnny grabbed a headlock to start and took Flair down w/ a shoulder tackle out of an Irish whip. Flair came back with chops and a back elbow smash. He followed with a jumping knee drop, which sent Johnny to the outside to recover. Flair followed, but ended up getting poked in the eye and back dropped on the floor. Back in the ring, Johnny hammered away at Flair w/ straight right handed shots. Flair came right back with several knife edge chops, but Johnny quickly regained momentum with a chop block. Johnny then locked in the Figure Four, but Flair made it to the ropes. Flair ended up on the apron, but Johnny suplexed him over the top rope back into the ring.

The Squad member then went to the top rope and came off looking for a flying spinning wheel kick. Flair moved, though, and gave Johnny a chop block soon after. He worked over the knee, but Johnny rolled him up for a near fall. The finish came when Flair reversed the roll-up at the last second and small packaged Johnny for the win. Flair defeated Johnny at 3:08.

Backstage, Lita said she was sorry about Vince, but wanted back the Women’s title. Micke James interrupted and made fun of Lita for thinking she should be handed back the belt. James said it was great that Trish went out on top and insulted Lita. Lita slapped Mickie in retaliation and walked off.

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The show opened with a live look inside the arena and a moment of silence for all those lost on 9/11/01. Signs were shown from throughout the arena that were dedicated to remembering 9/11. Howard Finkel then introduced the US Marine Corp. color guard and Lillian Garcia, who sang “America the Beautiful.” The “USA” chants followed from the MSG crowd…

Match 1: Ric Flair vs. Umaga (w/ Armando Alejandro Estrada)
- Flair wasted no time attacking Umaga with chops and a rake to the eyes. He then went downstairs with a chop block, but couldn’t knock the bigger man down. Umaga came back and tried to hit the Samoan Spike, but Flair hit him with three consecutive low blows (while AAE for some reason distracted the ref). Flair then grabbed a steel chair and got himself disqualified. Umaga didn’t sell it, though. Flair went to the outside to get the ring steps, but Umaga knocked them away. Umaga proceeded to drop Flair on the floor with a Samoan Drop.

The Samoan Bulldozer threw Flair back in the ring and tossed the ring steps in there after him. Before he could use them, though, Kane came down to the ring. The two brawled, but Kane got the upper hand and went for the chokeslam. Umaga countered, though, and hit a belly-to-belly suplex. He followed with a chair shot to the back and another to the head. Kane sat up as Umaga posed and gave the Bulldozer a big boot. The Big Red Machine drilled Umaga with the chair twice, but Umaga fell out of the ring and landed on his feet. Kane proceeded to throw the ring steps at him and hit him square in the face. AAE hightailed it and Kane posed in the ring. Umaga defeated Flair via DQ at 1:10.

JR and King hyped the main-events for tonight, including McMahon vs. Triple H and Edge/Nitro/Orton vs. Cena/Hardy/Carlito.

Lillian Garcia introduced the New York Police Department’s (bag) pipes and drums group. The Highlanders followed them out to the ring, as did none other than Rowdy Roddy Piper. The three kilt-bearers made their way to the ring. Piper took a mic and hyped the NYPD. A “Roddy” chant broke out, as Piper said he loved the crowd. He said he was wandering around 8th street in NYC when he came across the 51 worst offenders in wrestling history, which is featured in WWE Magazine. He hyped that he was number one and that the Highlanders were the #1 contenders to the tag titles. Piper and Robby had fun going back and forth saying their names, and then they had fun slapping each other.

The Spirit Squad interrupted the fun, though, and made their way to the top of the ramp. One of them spoke and trashed the three Scots. Piper said that they talked tough for guys that had their balls removed and replaced with palm-palms. He challenged them to a six-man tag team match. The Squad huddled and then accepted the challenge. NYPD took off and we went to commercial in anticipation of the forthcoming match.

Match 2: The Highlanders and Roddy Piper vs. The Spirit Squad
- The match began during the break, but back from the break, Piper and the Scots were in control. Robby held an arm bar, but the Squad distracted the ref, Piper, and Rory, allowing the rest of the Squad to interfere. Mikey came in and went to work on Robby’s arm. Johnny tagged in and pounded away at Robby in the corner. Kenny tagged in and the duo hit a double suplex, which JR called a double clothesline. A rest hold followed, but Robby escaped. The Squad interfered again, though, allowing Kenny to remain in control.

The cheap tactics continued from the tag champs, but Robby fought back and went thru a rough sequence w/ Mikey as they both tried for back elbow smashes. Kenny tagged back in and hit a flying back elbow. Johnny tagged back in, but got caught in a sunset flip for a near fall. The Squad member fought right back, though, and locked in a chinlock. Robby finally got the hot tag to Piper, who came in and cleaned house. He Roddy eventually isolated Mikey and knocked him out of the ring. Kenny then regained control for a short time, but ended up getting back body dropped by Piper over the top rope. Johnny tried to pick up where Kenny left off, but the Highlanders re-entered the ring and hit a double slingshot reverse suplex for the win. Piper and the Highlanders defeated the Squad at an estimated 6:00.

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The show opened with a recap of the events surrounding Edge and John Cena’s rivalry from last week. After it was over, the camera cut to WWE Champion Edge in the ring setting up tables, ladders, and chairs. He grabbed a mic and, surrounded by the very weapons legal in Unforgiven’s TLC championship match, said that the “John Cena gets out of my life forever countdown is on.”

From atop the ladder, Edge plugged the new CW network and hyped his match with Cena, saying that Cena can’t win in the champ’s hometown of Toronto, Canada. Edge proclaimed that Cena can’t beat him in the TLC match because Edge always wins TLC matches … and the TLC doesn’t play to Cena’s limited strengths. The champ bashed the fans and Cena’s intelligence and had a video, Rated-R of course, played of his TLC and other triumphs.

After the video, Edge said that it was only two weeks before Cena was off “his” show and before Edge would be free to become the greatest WWE Champion of all-time. At that point, Cena showed up and tried to knock Edge off the ladder. Edge leapt onto Cena from the top of the ladder to try and prevent the attack, but Cena caught him in body slam position, tossed him up onto his shoulders, and hit him with an FU through a table. The former champ then threw the ladder on top of the current champ and catered to the crowd with a celebration.

Backstage, Jeff Hardy painted a wall and was approached by Maria. Jeff said he was watching Nitro and Melina’s press conference from last week. Maria didn’t get it … but the point was to put over that it was like watching paint dry.

Match 1: Intercontinental Champion Johnny Nitro (w/ Melina) vs. Jeff Hardy
- Nitro connected on a dropkick to get first strike points. The crowd was behind Hardy, who quickly came back with consecutive roll-up near falls and a backslide for a third close call. Hardy then hit a reverse mule kick that sent Nitro to the outside. We then got a dreaded mid-match commercial break, but that was to be expected. Back from the break, Nitro had Hardy in a modified camel clutch. During the break, Nitro knocked Hardy to the floor with a standing dropkick. Hardy got to his feet, but Nitro threw Jeff into a backbreaker via pulling his hair and tugging him backwards. Nitro followed with a back drop for a near fall and then synched in a surfboard stretch.

Hardy got to his feet again, but Nitro quickly stomped him back down with several right handed blows. He went for that fancy spinning leg drop of his, but Hardy dodged it and hit a jawbreaker. Hardy tried to keep the offense going, but Nitro hung him up on the top rope. Nitro continued to dominate from there, focusing on the lower back with shoulder thrusts in the corner. Hardy again fought back, but couldn’t sustain the offense, as Nitro hit a Rock Bottom into a backbreaker and immediately followed with a Side Russian Leg sweep. The champ then locked in a rear bear hug before shoving Hardy into the corner and placing him on the top rope. Nitro followed suit and went for a superplex, but Hardy countered, flipped over Nitro, landed on his feet, and caught Nitro in the electric chair. The ref got to nine before both men made it to their feet. Hardy began his babyface comeback with flying forearms and a back drop. He followed with a Side Russian sweep of his own and scored a near fall with a unique pinning combo.

Nitro came back eventually with a standing shooting star press. Hardy came back quickly and tossed Nitro chest first into the turnbuckle before connecting on the Whisper in the Wind spinning corkscrew for a near fall. He tried to follow with the Swanton Bomb, but Nitro regained his footing in time to knock him off the top rope. Nitro couldn’t get back on the offensive, though, and Hardy came right back with the Twist of Fate. 1…2…No! Melina interfered, causing a DQ. Hardy defeated Nitro via DQ at 12:25.

Backstage, Women’s champion Lita bumped into Trish Stratus, who said it was nice that they bumped into each other because she was going to call her out to challenge her to a Women’s title match at Unforgiven. Trish told her to bring everything she had and “just bring it, bitch”… Lita slapped her in response, prompting a brawl. Carlito tried to break it up but got attacked Randy Orton. They had a short brawl of their own and they ended up yelling at each other as they were being pulled apart by several referees.

More hype for the The Marine …

Match 2: Chris Masters vs. Super Crazy
- Masters pushed Crazy to the mat to start the match. He did it again and posed to no crowd reaction. Masters followed with a body slam, but Crazy came back with a running dropkick. Chris came right back with a big boot before tossing Crazy shoulder-first into the ring post. Masters proceeded to latch on a key lock, but soon after took the newcomer down with a power slam. Crazy made a comeback with a springboard dropkick and a Senton splash to the outside. He then went to the top rope and connected on a sunset flip for a near fall.

He tried to keep it up with another high risk, but missed. Masters tried for the Master Lock, but Crazy escaped and got a near fall with a reverse rolling clutch pin. The finish came when Crazy surprised Masters with another quick dropkick and got the pin following a top rope moonsault. Crazy defeated Masters at 3:58.

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The following results are courtesy of lordsofpain.net ...

A recap aired of the DX antics from last week and the subsequent breakdown of Chairman of the Board, Vince McMahon.

The show opened with Shane McMahon coming down to the ring. He wasn’t his usual dancing-fool self either, as he came to the ring with a straight face and looking all-business, so to speak. Shane grabbed a microphone and said that DX had a lot of balls and had reached new lows with their sophomoric pranks. He said they’d gone too far when they endangered him and his dad’s lives at the end of Raw last week. He continued by saying that they’d managed to tear out a piece of Vince’s heart, to the point that the man couldn’t even enjoy his birthday last Thursday.

Vince, for that reason, was not going to be here tonight and would be staying at the hotel. Shane, thus, was in charge of the show and immediately made a match b/t DX and opponents that were on a strictly need-to-know basis. He said that by the end of the night, DX would not only learn the identity of their opponents, but also their fate for Unforgiven. Shane said that without further ado, he’d like to send DX straight to hell, but at that point WWE Champion Edge (w/ Women’s champ Lita) showed up. Edge, looking frustrated, said that Shane needed to do something about John Cena throwing the champ into the harbor last week. He said he was the champion and you don’t throw him in the Long Island Sound.

Edge said he wanted Cena fired and out of his life, but at that point John Cena came to the ring. Cena, to a mixed reaction, called Edge “Skeletor” and mocked Edge’s storytelling that ends happily for the champion. The former champion also made fun of Lita, calling her a whore and suggesting Shane give her ten bucks and enjoy the ride. Cena said that if Edge wanted him gone, then all he needs to do is give him one more match for the title. If he loses, he’ll go to Smackdown (he had already pulled out a signed contract from Teddy Long). Edge agreed, but on two conditions: 1) He gets to decide where the match takes place and 2) He gets to name what kind of match they face off in. Cena agreed to the terms and tried to leave…but Shane said he was not dismissed, yet. Shane said that Cena cannot disrespect the champion like he did last week and get away with it. Thus, he’d have to wrestle in a match that would begin right now…

Match 1: John Cena vs. Chris Masters
- Cena caught Masters with a belly-to-belly suplex as we returned from the break. He followed with a fisherman’s suplex for a near fall. Masters came back with a boot to the face and a running clothesline. Chris was supporting a goatee. A “Cena Sucks” chant broke out, as Masters continued to dominate. Cena fought back, but ended up getting powerslammed for his troubles. Masters then locked in a modified Camel Clutch. Cena broke the hold and hit a pair of diving shoulder tackles. A Prototype spinning back drop and Five Knuckle Shuffle followed, but when Cena went for the FU, Masters countered and hit a reverse DDT.

Chris tried for the Master Lock, but Cena countered into the STFU. Masters was about to tap, but Edge came to the ring and blasted Cena with a steel chair. Thus, Cena won via DQ at around 4:00. After the match, Edge got a ladder from under the ring and clocked Cena right in the forehead. The champ shook his head to indicate he wasn’t finished and retrieved a table from under the ring. He set it up in the corner and threw Cena shoulder-first through it. Edge grabbed a mic, said that Cena’s title match was going to take place in Toronto, Canada at Unforgiven … and it’d be a TLC match.

Backstage, Haas/Viscera and Cade/Murdoch asked Shane if they could face DX tonight. Shane got a call from Vince. Via a split screen, Vince talked of how happy he was to be back at the hotel eating food, drinking wine, and relaxing. The door bell rang at Vince’s hotel. Vince told whoever it was to come in, assuming it was room service. He turned around when he heard the sound of a rooster. DX had delivered to “cocks” in cages to Vince’s room. On the other end of the phone, Shane was asking what was going on.

Further backstage, Carlito and Trish Stratus talked about what they were going to do tonight after the show. Carlito asked Trish when she was planning on telling him that she was retiring. Apparently, wwe.com mobile alerts had indicated that Lita found out about Trish retiring after Unforgiven and spilled the beans. Trish got a little pissed about Lita letting the cat out of the bad. Carlito said it was cool and supported her decision … but he gave her a kiss to make sure she was going to get a proper goodbye. Randy Orton snuck up behind them, though, and blasted Carlito, sending him right into Trish. Orton finished up his attack by throwing Carlito into a crate.

JR and King showed footage of Umaga’s attack on Kane, which led to Kane bleeding from the mouth.

Match 2: Back to School, Paddle on a Pole Match - Torrie Wilson vs. Candice Michelle
- They each tried to get the pole for about the first-minute, but Candice locked on her unique leg choke hold while draped over the top rope to take control. Candice nearly reached the Paddle, but decided to rip off her top instead. Torrie caught up to her and powerbombed her into the turnbuckle. She then took off her skirt and gave Candice the Stink Face. The finish came when Candice pushed Torrie ass-first out of the way. Candice defeated Torrie and got to spank her. After the match, they took turns spanking each other.

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A recap of last night’s SummerSlam PPV aired.

The show opened with WWE Champion Edge coming out to the ring without the title belt. The crowd didn’t give him a very warm welcome, but Edge went on anyway, saying that he had waited his entire life for this moment. He said that the people who bought their tickets tonight to see Cena come out with the title were all wrong. Edge hyped the fact that he beat the odds to retain the title. But where’s his championship belt? And where is the Women’s Champion, Lita? The crowd chanted “You Suck.”

Edge said they couldn’t rain on his parade. The camera cut to Lita live at the Bridgeport harbor, and she had the WWE title with her. Edge said that she had John Cena’s title with her, not his WWE title. Therefore, Edge wanted to rid the world of the spinner belt with a burial at sea. Lita said it’d be her pleasure and tossed the spinner belt into the water. Edge proclaimed that the era of John Cena was over…and that the Rated R Era was just beginning. He then presented the same belt that Cena had, just with a Rated R spinner in the center of it. Edge asked if there were any other challengers out there that wanted to be a part of his story.

At that point, Jeff Hardy made his return to RAW and interrupted the champion. Jeff got in Edge’s face. Edge said he thought he died three years ago and poked fun at ruining Matt Hardy’s career. Jeff attacked with a reverse mule kick. He tried to follow with a Swanton Bomb, but Edge rolled out of the ring before Hardy could get an attempt in. The segment closed with Edge scampering to the back, while Hardy posed in the ring. mind the spinner, but I like tradition)

Match 1: World Tag Team Champs The Spirit Squad vs. Eugene, Hacksaw Jim Duggan, and the Highlanders
- The squad jumped the faces before the match began. Johnny started off the official match against Eugene by working over his arm. Eugene and the crowd got fired up. Johnny continued to dominate until Eugene caught him with a heel kick and an airplane spin. Robby tagged in and tossed Johnny into Rory’s head. The Highlander followed with a dropkick. Johnny came back with a rolling kick after the Squad got involved. A double suplex followed from Kenny and Johnny. Kenny came in and hit a jumping back elbow for a near fall. Mikey and Kenny combined for a leg toss-moonsault. Robby fought back, but ended up trapped in the heels corner. Mitch and Mikey then combined for an assisted jumping punch in the corner.

Kenny tagged in soon after and took Robby down with a hard right hand. A swinging neckbreaker followed, but Kenny proceeded to miss his top rope leg drop, allowing Rory to get the hot tag and clean house. He hit a Rock Bottom into a backbreaker for a near fall, but another Squad member got involved. The finish came when the Highlanders got the pin following a springboard reverse suplex. The Highlanders, Eugene, and Duggan defeated the Spirit Squad at 6:12.

Backstage, Edge busted into McMahon’s office only to find the Coach working out on his Bowflex machine. Edge wanted Hardy in a match…so he got it. The McMahons walked in after Edge left and asked if DX had arrived yet. Coach said they had not, and Vince told him to leave. VKM said he couldn’t believe that people were saying they lost at SummerSlam. Shane said it wasn’t legal and should be stricken from the record book. Vince said it wasn’t over with DX.

Backstage, Todd Grisham interviewed Randy Orton. The Legend Killer said he beat Hogan last night despite Hulk’s foot being on the rope. He said he was going to use that aggression he’d built up in the last 24 hours to beat the hell out of a real legend in Ric Flair. Carlito showed up and interrupted the segment. He said that Hogan getting his hand raised in victory was cool. Orton asked Carlito where he was last night. Not on the card that’s for sure. He insulted Carlito and demanded respect of him.

Further backstage, Triple H told us a quick story. After overcoming the odds to defeat Vince McMahon, DX couldn’t help, but notice Vince’s private plane flying overhead. Shawn Michaels appeared w/ a toy plane and pretend to crash and catch fire ala Ricky Bobby in Talladega Nights. Trips said he and Shawn had to see the plane for themselves. Unfortunately, Trips said, there was an incident during their visit to Vince’s plane. They sipped champagne as they marveled over their “scratch” that they’d put on the plane. Of course, that scratch was a large DX logo that they painted on the side of the aircraft. The camera cut back to Vince’s office, where VKM was so irate he threw a TV.

Match 2: Trish Stratus vs. Victoria
- Victoria struck first with a hard right hand, but Trish came back quickly with forearm shots, a splash in the corner, and a dropkick that sent Victoria to the outside. Trish followed with a Lou Thesz press to the outside and then slammed Victoria’s back into the ring post. Back in the ring, Trish scored a near fall with a rolling clutch pin. She tried for the Stratusfaction, but Victoria countered into a backbreaker. Victoria took control for a short time until Trish countered a backbreaker into a head scissor. Trish later nailed a top rope hurricanrana, but Victoria came back and attempted the Widow’s Peak. Trish countered and hit the Stratusfaction for the win. Trish won at 3:02.

Vince and Shane came to the ring right after the women’s match ended. Vince did not look happy. He took the mic and said that he supposed that the people enjoyed what DX did to his plane. He said he it was a 30 million dollar aircraft and the people encourage that kind of behavior. The crowd chanted “You Suck,” but Vince continued on by saying that DX sucked and would get what is coming to them when the cops arrest them in a few minutes. A commercial break interrupted the segment.

Back from the break, Vince was still pacing around waiting to see what the police were going to do. The camera cut to the Bridgeport airport, where DX were standing by from the roof of the WWE Headquarters in Stamford. DX said that Vince did have a lot going for him, w/ a jet, a big company, etc. They said Vince had left his mark. Vince yelled that they were supposed to be at the airport. Obviously, DX wanted to leave their mark on WWE Headquarters…they had spray-painted a big DX logo on the building. Vince looked sick to his stomach. As the McMahons left the ringside area, the crowd chanted “Nah Nah Nah Nah, Nah Nah Nah Nah, Hey Hey Hey, Goodbye!”

Backstage, Shane said he couldn’t believe it. Vince still looked sick. Mick Foley walked up and said hello. Vince wasn’t happy that Mick called him Vince. The McMahons mentioned how Foley had bad mouthed him the last few weeks in his promos. Vince said he could join the “Kiss my Ass” club tonight. Foley laughed at the ridiculous notion, but Vince said if Foley didn’t kiss his ass, somebody was going to get fired. .

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