WWE RAW Results News (Page 4)

After the credits, Shawn Michaels' music hits to a massive pop. Shawn comes down to the ring and grabs a mic. HBK says no excuses, the better man won last night. The reason he's out here is that he wants to invite Randy Orton to the ring so that he can shake his hand. Orton appears on the jumbotron. He's battered and bruised, and says its a result of another superkick. He's not coming to the ring. HBK says "you got me, if you came down here I was gonna kick you again, but if it makes you feel better, I was going to wait until after I challenged you to a rematch."

Orton tells Shawn that he's not getting his rematch, as he already proved he's the better man over HBK, Triple H, and John Cena.

Kennedy's music hits, and Mr. Kennedy comes to the ring. As soon as the mic comes down, Michaels hits Kennedy and clotheslines him out of the ring. Kennedy pulls Michaels out of the ring and begins punching him, irish whipping him into the ringpost. Kennedy gets back in the ring and says HBK has had his shot, and its his turn. Shawn attacks him again, pulling him out of the ring and clotheslining him. Shawn tells Kennedy to cry him a river, he just got his chance at the Showstopper, right here, right now. Kennedy tells Shawn that nicknames are given, not chosen, so he can stop calling himself the Showstopper. Kennedy says Shawn is known for losing all the time; he's a loser.

Kennedy vs. Shawn Michaels
We come back to see Kennedy and Michaels fighting on the outside, and we find out that the bell has yet to sound. The ref is standing there, unable to ring the bell until they get in the ring. The two men are brawling, and eventually make their way into the crowd. Kennedy slams Michaels hard back over the security wall to the ringside area. HBK slams Kennedy into the announce table, and this is totally out of control. HBK gets into the ring, and Kennedy grabs a chair and goes to follow. As Kennedy gets on the ring apron, HBK lands Sweet Chin Music, planting the chair into Kennedy's face. This fight has ended with HBK standing tall.
Winner: Shawn Michaels

Santino Marella vs. Jerry "the King" Lawler
After talking some trash to each other, King hits a dropkick which dazes Marella and sends him running away. They lock up, and King puts Marella into the corner, which is then reversed by Santino, who irish whips King into the other corner and hits him with a shoulder. King grabs Santino, hits a few punches, and throws him into the opposite turnbuckle, but misses a tackle and hits the ring post. Santino takes control, hitting an armbar takedown and a flying headbutt to Lawler's back. Marella gets out of the ring, puts on Jerry's crown, and starts making fun of JR and Lawler. Lawler responds by smacking him, putting him into the ropes and hitting an armdrag takedown. Marella begins begging Lawler, only to put King into the rope and attempting an armdrag takedown. Jerry reverses this into a backslide and gets the pin!
Winner: Jerry Lawler

Orton comes out of nowhere and puts King out with an RKO out of nowhere. Orton says he's sorry. Tonight, Orton says, he'll have a "Passing of the Torch" ceremony.

Grisham is in the back talking with Kennedy. Kennedy says all he did was go out there to show HBK some respect, but Shawn Michaels decided to superkick a chair into his face. He asks Shawn why he would do that? Kennedy says it's because HBK sees his career evaporating, and is doing everything he can to hold Kennedy down. He says that won't happen, because Father Time is catching up with Shawn, but next time HBK won't have to worry about Father Time, only Mr. Kennedy. VERY strong, intense promo by Kennedy.

Jeff Hardy v. Umaga
Jeff Hardy starts off trying to hit Umaga, but Umaga's not phased. Jeff stays out of Umaga's way until both men end up outside. Umaga hits him a few times, but when they get back in the ring, Hardy hits a low dropkick, and a sunset flip. Hardy hits a running elbow, but when he tries again, Umaga throws his shoulder into Hardy. Umaga starts stomping away on Jeff, and picks him up by the hair. Jeff starts hitting back, but gets caught with a big back elbow by the Samoan Bulldozer. Umaga locks in a shoulder nerve hold, and Jeff is fading fast. Jeff struggles back to his feet, but Umaga grabs the hair and yanks Hardy back down, locking in the nerve hold once again. The crowd gets behind Hardy as he gets back to his feet again. Umaga puts Hardy in the corner, but misses a shouldersmash. Hardy capitalizes with a DDT and heads to climb the ropes. Umaga pushes Hardy off the apron to the outside as we go to commercial...

We're back, and Umaga once again has the nerve hold on Hardy. come...on... Jeff Hardy gets back to his feet, goes for a bodyslam and actually picks him up, but Umaga falls back on him and gets a 2 count. Umaga locks in the nerve hold AGAIN. Jeff gets up and starts reaches for the ropes but can't reach them. Hardy to his feet again, hits the ropes, and is caught by Umaga in a back body drop. Umaga hits a big leg drop and a body splash, but still only manages a two count. Umaga picks Hardy up and hits two kicks to the stomach and spinning heel kick, getting only a two count again. Umaga hits Hardy with a a series of big right hands that send Hardy to the apron. Jeff grabs Umaga's neck and snaps it across the ropes. Jeff gets on the top rope and goes for a flying body press, but Umaga catches it and hits a massive sidewalk slam. Umaga goes for the pin, but Jeff kicks out again! Jeff, like his brother Matt, will not die.

Banzai Drop by Umaga... and another nerve hold. Jeff gets out of it once more, only to catch a big boot to the face. Umaga climbs to the top rope but misses a flying headbutt. Both men back to their feet, but Umaga hits Jeff into the corner. Umaga misses a wrecking ball, but Hardy runs and hits a Whisper in the Wind. Jeff gets a two count, and two men start exchanging blows. Jeff hits his mule kick, Umaga goes for a big splash but misses. Jeff tries to capitalize with a Swanton, but misses. Umaga hits the Samoan Drop, and goes for a samoan strike, but Hardy counters with a twist of fate. Umaga rolls out of the ring, but is caught with a baseball slide by Jeff Hardy. Hardy then goes over the top rope with a plancha on to Umaga.

Hardy gets back in the ring, but Snitsky comes out of nowhere and attacks Hardy. Hardy turns the tables on Snitsky, only to get blindsided with a clothesline by Umaga. Both men throw Jeff out of the ring, but the Game's music hits! Triple H decks Snitsky! Triple H decks Umaga! Umaga tries for a big splash but hits the ringpost and catches a spinebuster! Snitsky is put over the ropes with a big clothesline, and Jeff and Triple H stand tall as Snitsky and Umaga recover on the outside.
Winner: Jeff Hardy by DQ

Cody Rhodes v. Hardcore Holly
Holly with the upper hand early, with an inside cradle for a two count. Cody comes back with a clothesline and a 2 count. Both men come ot their feet, stare off, and Holly hits 2 bodyslams back to back. Holly starts choking Rhodes with the middle rope, and after a snapmare, locks in a sleeper. Cody powers out with a few punches, only to be hit hard by Holly. Holly puts Cody in the corner and smacks away. Cody comes back with a few right hands, hitting a russian legsweep. Cody into the ropes, but Holly catches him and lifts him up for an Alabama Slam. Cody reverses it with a sunset flip. Holly rolled out of it, got to his feet, but Cody was waiting with a DDT for the win!
Winner: Cody Rhodes

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We begin with Batista making a surprise appearance. The crowd goes crazy, the pyro heats the place up, and the World Heavyweight Champion makes his way to the ring.

Batista grabs the mic and says it's good to be back on Raw, although he's grown quite fond of Smackdown. He says he was invited by William Regal to take on some Raw competition. Although he appreciates the invitation, Regal made a mistake:Batista is gearing up for Survivor Series, for Hell in a Cell, and for the Undertaker. He'll be locked in a cell with a man who wants to kill him, but there are no rules - and weapons are not only welcome, but allowed. So, before his victim comes out, Batista has a message for the Undertaker...

DONG! The bells ring and the Undertaker arrives on Raw! Taker makes his way to the ring and takes his coat off, ready to fight. The men square off, but Regal's music hits. Regal says he invited both of them for competition, but it's not against each other. Tonight, they'll be partners against the finest tag team on Raw. Cade and Murdoch's theme hits, and the World tag-team champs come down to do battle with the Animal and the Dead Man.

Batista and Undertaker vs. Cade and Murdoch
Taker starts by attacking Cade, delivering shoulder blocks, and Old School! As he sizes Cade up for a chokeslam, Batista tags himself in. He puts Cade in the turnbuckle and hits him with his shoulder. Cade catches Batista with a big boot, and gets Murdoch in. Murdoch starts hammering away on Batista, flooring him with a clothesline. He tags Cade back in, and they do the atomic leg drop on Batista, resulting in a 2 count. Batista powers back to his feet, and delivers a spinebuster to the charging Cade. Taker tags himself back in, grabs Cade and delivers a chokeslam. Undertaker gets a 2, as Murdoch interferes. Batista spears Murdoch, as Undertaker measures up Cade and delivers a tombstone for the 1, 2, 3!
Winners: Batista and Undertaker

Batista grabs Murdoch and delivers the Batista-bomb. The Animal and the Dead Man stare each other down in the center of the ring.

Beth Phoenix v. Maria
Beth Phoenix stalks Maria, slamming her down. Maria gets Beth in the corner, and puts a boot in her face. Beth strikes back, throwing Maria down into the splits, then kicking her a few times. Maria comes back a stiff boot to the head, followed with a head scissors, but Beth reverses into a standing surfboard. Beth drops Maria once more, and picks her up and puts her in the fisherman's suplex for the win.
Winner: Beth Phoenix

The Hardy Boyz and Rey Mysterio vs. MVP, Finlay, and KennedyFinlay starts off against Matt Hardy, as the two lock up with Matt getting the advantage early. Finlay then gets a headlock, and hits Matt with a clothesline. Finlay tags in Kennedy who gets some offense in, and tags in MVP. Matt and MVP stare off... but MVP tags in Kennedy. Matt and Kennedy exchange blows for awhile, until Kennedy buries Matt with a knee. Kennedy sends Matt into the ropes only to get caught with a crossbody by Matt. Finlay comes in but gets sent over the ropes and to the outside by Matt. Kennedy grabs Matt from behind and throws him out of the ring to join Finlay as we go to break.We come back to Kennedy with Matt in a sleeper. Matt gets to his feet, but Kennedy tries to do the green bay plunge, but Matt kicks out and hits a modified side-effect. Kennedy crawls and tags Finlay, as Matt gets to his corner. Matt lands the hot tag to Rey, who begins going after Finlay with dropkicks. Rey misses a springboard crossbody, and Finlay capitalizes with a few nasty boots, tagging in MVP. MVP works on Rey's ribs with a few kicks and locks in a seated abdominal stretch. MVP tags in Finlay who gets a 2 count, and delivers a backbreaker. Finlay cheapshots Jeff Hardy, who runs into the ring and chases Finlay away. Finlay tags in Kennedy who delivers a double backbreaker, and begins stretching out Rey over his knee.

Rey begins punching and kicking his way out of it, forcing Kennedy to break the hold. Rey tries to get a tag, but Kennedy drags him away and tags in MVP. MVP goes to work on the ribs once more. MVP sends Rey into the ropes, but Rey reverses and hits a DDT on MVP. Rey gets the tag onto jeff, who lays out MVp, clears the corner, hits a whisper in the wind, and gets a 2 count when Kennedy comes in. Jeff droptoeholds both Kennedy and MVP into the ropes, Rey hits a double 619, and Hardy hits the swanton on MVP for the win!
Winners: The Hardyz and Rey

We get another mystery promo: it says 6 days, 23 hours - X+1=Y, J=9+1 - Break_the_Walls. So, there you have it folks. Chris Jericho, next Monday on Raw. Way to drop the ball on the mystery, WWE.

Vince McMahon is in the ring. He talks up the Survivor Series match between Randy Orton and HBK, and then introduces HBK. Shawn comes out to the usual crowd reaction. Vince then introduces Randy Orton, who gets resounding boos. Both men face each other in the ring, with Vince there to moderate. HBK says that he's aware of the stipulations for their match, and he's aware of who come up with them. Orton reiterates what the rules are, and HBK interupts and says that he knows the rules. Orton says that he is sick of being told that he intentionally disqualified at Cyber Sunday when he just defended himself. HBK says that the reason Orton got the Super Kick banned was because Orton has been feasting on it for the last five weeks, and at Survivor Series, it would have been number six.

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Raw starts tonight with DX's theme hitting to a massive pop. Triple H and Shawn Michaels make their way to the ring, throwing green glow-sticks to the crowd on their way. They grab a mics, and after pumping the crowd up some more, Triple H announces that it's for one night only, and asks if the LA crowd if they're ready? Then, for the thousands in attendance and millions watching around the world... Hornswoggle's music hits, and little McMahon jumps out from the bottom of the ring, surprising Shawn and Triple H. HHH says "that's different" and tells Hornswoggle to get back under the ring. HHH asks Shawn if he's got a run-sheet, and after fiddling around, Shawn gives it to HHH, and HHH tells Hornswoggle that he's not in this segment... he's in the short segment. Hornswoggle jumps on Shawn and puts an armbar on him. Shawn gets out, and pronounces that Hornswoggle is "in for tonight." HHH sends Hornswoggle away again, but Hornswoggle says there's a monster under the ring. HBK goes and checks, but gets dragged underneath, only to come out with wroms in his mouth. Shawn gets the worms out, and the Boogeyman's music hits. HHH says "ok... can I help you?"

Boogeyman says he wants to join DX. HBK says "ok, he's in too." HHH says "What the hell, get in line, you can never have enough freaks and weirdos." As soon as they line up to do the "lets get ready to suck it" part, Khali's music hits, and Khali comes down to the ring. HBK says before we even start, to keep him from getting beat down, lets just pretend he's not here, and move on. HHH says "ok, if you want to be part of DX, get in the back." Khali gets in the back. HHH starts doing a hilarious Indian accent, and the start to do the line once more, but Coach's music hits. Coach comes out, and says "Enough!" Coach says he's shutting this nonsense down, the crowd didn't come to see the immature antics. HHH calls Coach "George Jefferson" and tells him to lower his tone. HHH tells Runjin that Coach was talking trash about Khali. Runjin translates it to Khali, who then walks up and gives Khali a big chop to the forehead. Coach takes off running, and Khali follows him.

Back in the ring, Shawn and Triple H are standing, and everyone else has disappeared. HBK calls this the worst debacle since "That whole Katie Vick thing" and asks who wrote this segment. HHH says "nobody writes this, they're all on strike... but we're not" to a resounding cheer. They say "lets get ready to suck it!" and if you're not down with that, they have two words for ya. DX celebrates to the familiar music as we go to commercial.

Kelly Kelly v. Beth Phoenix
Beth walks up to Kelly, grabs her arm, and throws her down. This is followed by a fisherman suplex, and a three count. Beth dominates.
Winner: Beth Phoenix

Snitsky v. Jobber "Joey"
Snitsky throws him into the corner and smashes him with an elbow. Then, we get a big boot, and the pumphandle slam for the three count.

Winner: Snitsky

Carlito gets in the ring and raises Snitsky's hand, congratulating him. Snitsky nails Carlito with a big boot, and then hits him with a pumphandle slam.

Rey Mysterio and Jeff Hardy v. Finlay and Kennedy
Kennedy is already in the ring when we come back, he is soon joined by Finlay. Misterio comes out, and is followed by Jeff Hardy, who gets the biggest pop of the night so far.

The match starts with Hardy and Finlay. A "Hardy" chant starts right away. Finlay and Hardy size each other up, and Finlay hits a Shoulder block, but Hardy doesn't go down. Finlay takes Hardy down, but Hardy counters and gets a two count. Finlay and Hardy both get up and tussle a but, before Hardy smacks Finlay and attacks Kennedy, who tried to attack Hardy. Kennedy is sent to the outside, but a clothesline from Finlay soon makes Hardy join him. Kennedy beats down Hardy, and Finlay tries to get Hardy back in the ring. An arguement between the two flares up, and Finlay and Kennedy go face to face as we go to a break.

We come back to see Mysterio and Kennedy in the ring. Rey hits a springboard body press followed by a headscissors takedown. After yet another high flying move, Kennedy hits a dropkick to the legs that grounds Mysterio. Kennedy tags in Finlay, who comes in and stomps at the legs of the fallen Mysterio. Finlay lifts up the high flying, slams him down, and locks in a half crab. Mysterio tries to make a tag, but Finlay breaks the hold and attacks Jeff. Finlay then goes and tags Kennedy, who starts to work on the leg of Mysterio some more. Kennedy tags out, Finlay works some more, then Kennedy comes back in. Kennedy works over Rey a bit, and then Finlay is tagged back in again.

These two are tearing Rey apart. Finlay gets Rey in the corner, but Rey manages to drive his foot into Finlay's face. Rey follows up with a bulldog and tags in Hardy. Finlay tags in Kennedy. Hardy goes into it, hitting his usual flurry of moves. Jeff gets a two count after a falling clothesline, and follows it up with a whisper in the wind. Finlay comes in and throws Hardy to the outside. Misterio comes in and manages to prime both Finlay and Kennedy for the 619. Finlay ditches to the outside, and Kennedy gets the kick to the face. Rey then leaps off the apron to take out Finlay. Hardy is now up top and hits the swanton for the win.
Winners: Jeff Hardy and Rey Mysterio

Santino hits the ring with Maria, saying that he's putting the rumors to rest. Steve Austin is not going to be here; he's like Kobe Bryant: he's bald, he's popular, and he doesn't want to be in L.A. either. Santino introduces the director of "the Condemned" and asks him a question: When he was filming "The Condemned" did he wish the guns were real so he could blow his brains out? The audience wished they could do that. Tonight, there will be no stomping of mudpies, and JR won't have an orgasm, because the Rattlesnake isn't here. WAIT, yes he is. Steve Austin's music hits and here comes Stone Cold. Stone Cold comes in to a MASSIVE pop. There's nobody like Stone Cold. This is awesome. Austin grabs the mic, holding a copy of the movie "The Condemned."

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We begin with a WWE Diva Battle Royal, which quickly erupts into bedlam, as all the Divas attack each other. Layla is eliminated first, followed by Brooke. Michelle McCool eliminates Jillian, and is then eliminated herself.

Melina and Mickie eliminate each other, leaving Kelly Kelly, Victoria, and Torrie Wilson in the ring against each other. Tori knocks down Victoria (in sumo costume), and her and Kelly push her out of the ring. Finally, Torrie is knocked out by Kelly Kelly!
Winner: Kelly Kelly

HBK's music hits, and Shawn Michaels appears to quite an ovation! Shawn comes to the ring and, after pandering to the crowd a bit, he grabs a mic. He thanks everyone who voted for him into the match at Cyber Sunday, and says he's got good news and bad news. The good news is that once again, he knocked Randy Orton out cold with some Sweet Chin Music. The Bad news is that he doesn't have the WWE championship. He says Orton intentionally got himself disqualified last night, and since he won the match, he gets a rematch... which he wants RIGHT NOW.

Vince McMahon's music hits, and the Chairman struts down to the ring. VKM asks how many people want to see a rematch. Everyone cheers a resounding "Yes." Vince asks Shawn what he's doing... that there's something else Shawn wants more than the WWE Championship: revenge. Vince has known Shawn since he was 23 years old, and deep down, there's a part of his soul that's rotten, and there's not a thing Shawn can do about it. Shawn admits it. He sat home for four months, leaving the industry for the second time. He says the next time he leaves, it will be on his terms. Randy tried to change that, and he can't have that.

HBK wants to take out Randy, and asks if he can have his rematch or not. Vince says that Survivor Series is an aptly named PPV, and Shawn's got his rematch. But, what will he do about it? Shawn throws a superkick to Vince, but intentionally misses, having Vince cower and get out of the ring.

Hardcore Holly and Cody Rhodes v. WGTT
Holly starts off against Shelton, with Benjamin getting the advantage early. Shelton tags in Haas, who punishes Holly in the cornerwith some punches. Holly tries to make a comeback, but Haas beats him with a waistlock, putting him on the ground. After quick tags, Haas is back in, but gets caught with a dropkick by Holly. Holly tags in in Cody who hits a shoulderblock off the top ropes, and a dropkick for a 1 count. Cody hits a powerslam on Haas, but Shelton breaks up the pin. Holly rushes in and knocks Shelton out of the ring, and the two begin to brawl outside of the ring. Cody hits Haas with a DDT, and gets the win!
Winners: Holly and Rhodes

We get an update on Candice Michelle. Apparently she broke her clavicle in two places, but will be back in a few weeks.

Coach v. Hornswoggle
Before the match starts, we get the announcement that there is a special guest referee: Mick Foley. The Hardcore Legend gets quite an ovation, and Hornswoggle hugs his leg. Coach looks confused.

Coach tries to run at Hornswoggle, but Foley stops him and says something to him. Then, Foley says to go ahead. Coach gets Hornswoggle into the corner and pushes him around, but Hornswoggle steps on his foot and then dropkicks his leg. Hornswoggle mounts Coach and rides him like a donkey. Coach gets back up and lifts Horswoggle, but is bitten in the ear. Coach drops the little guy and is dropkicked again. Hornswoggle covers, but Coach easily kicks out on a one count. Hornswoggle climbs the bottom rope and tries for an elbow drop, but Coach moves. Coach now has the advantage. Foley stops him from capitalizing, and Coach hits Foley from behind. Coach now climbs outside and grabs a chair. He gets back in and attempts to hit Hornswoggle, but Foley is now up and takes the chair from Coach. Foley knocks Coach down and pulls out a sock for Mr. Socko, but then pulls out a smaller one and gives it to Hornswoggle. Hornswoggle puts in on, and Coach is up. Foley looks to hit Coach, to which Coach turns into a Mandible Claw from Hornswoggle...on his crotch. Coach is in pain, and Foley gives a clothesline. Hornswoggle now mounts the TOP rope and hits a frog splash for the win.
Winner: Hornswoggle

Paul London v. Lance Cade
London up early, dodging everything Cade threw at him, and hitting a crossbody. Cade finally grabs London and hits a belly to back suplex, getting a 2 count. Cade starts working on London with blows to the back. London counters with a standing hurricanrana, but is quickly thrown out of the ring. Murdoch nearly interferes, but Kendrick comes in, goes outside, and hits a splash to the outside. Inside of the ring, London goes for a sunset flip over the ropes, but gets only a 2 count. Cade then hits a sit-down spinebuster for the win.
Winner: Lance Cade

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We begin with Kennedy already in the ring. He puts over Cyber Sunday, saying that everyone has an opportunity to make history by choosing who will face Randy Orton for the WWE Championship. On the one hand, you have IC Champ Jeff Hardy. Hardy is like Hilary Clinton (mad boos), what with the famous last name and blonde hair. Jeff can't get the job done because like Hilary, he has no testicles. On the other hand, you have Shawn Michaels. Shawn is like Rudy Giuliani. Both talk big and have good resumes, but both live in the past.

Kennedy asks Shawn what he's done for him lately, because it's nowhere near as impressive as what he's done over the past two years: US Champ, Money in the Bank, beating Rey, Batista, and even The Undertaker. So to paraphrase a famous politician, "Ask not what Mr. Kennedy can do for you, but what you can do for Mr. Kennedy." If elected, Kennedy will win the title, and there will be a new Champion... Mr. Kennedy.

Kennedy is interrupted with a "Yo! Kennedy, over here, dude." Jeff Hardy is standing in the crowd. Jeff says Kennedy's approval rating sucks. Kennedy says that Jeff does not want to debate Kennedy - his success speaks for itself. Jeff makes his way through the fans as Kennedy insults the crowd and accuses Jeff of begging for votes. Jeff says Kennedy failed when he tried to be a McMahon, and failed when he tried to beat Jeff Hardy, and come Cyber Sunday, he'll fail again. Jeff says there's one vote he can win, and asks the crowd how many people want to see him beat the holy hell out of Kennedy right now. The crowd cheers, and Hardy jumps in the ring, but Orton comes down and they team up on Hardy. HBK comes down and takes out Orton before Orton can get the big kick off, and Hardy clotheslines Kennedy out of the ring. Hardy is left standing in the ring with his music playing.

Mickie James, London, and Kendrick v. Melina, Cade, and Murdoch
Lance Cade starts out against Paul London. London up early with a headlock takeover, but Cade throws him into the ropes and hits a shoulderblock. Cade in control until London hits a crossbody, and tags in Kendrick for a doubleteam sunset flip that gets a 2 count. London is tagged back in, and he hits an axehandle on to Cades waiting arm. London tags Kendrick back in and he does the same. Kendrick tags Mickie, which brings in Melina. Mickie with a few kicks that leave Melina scrambling to tag Murdoch. Kendrick comes in to meat him and Murdoch hits a few moves and tags in Cade. Cade takes control, hits a few knees, and tags in Murdoch. Double-team Legdrop on Kendrick, but only gets a two count. Murdoch tags back in Cade, and Cade gets met with a dropkick by Kendrick.

Cade tags in Murdoch, and Kendrick leaps and tags in London. London hits a spinning heel kick, but gets interrupted at the pinfall attempt when Lance Cade comes in and breaks everything up. Murdoch gets up, shoves Mickie down, and gets ready to hit a double team move on London. Mickie jumps back in and eliminates Melina with a Thesz press, when a charging Cade accidentally hits Murdoch with a clothesline, who then falls out of the ring. London hits a standing shooting star on Murdoch, and gets the pin. They celebrate, but Mickie looks cautious, as if something happened that wasn't supposed to happen.
Winners: Kendrick, London, and Mickie

Cody is in the back reading the new WWE Magazine, when Shelton and Haas come up to him and make fun of him for losing to Bob Holly. Shelton says the good news is that he won't be getting beaten up by Bob tonight, but he'll still be beaten up by Shelton in their match. Cody says the difference is that he actually respects Bob Holly, and makes fun of Shelton's blonde hair. Shelton says after tonight, Cody should dye his hair blonde, so he can be a younger, less talented, skinnier, uglier version of his father. As they walk away, Haas snaps his fingers and says "Oh Snap!"

Coach and Regal are talking. Apparently Vince is out of the country, and Coach is asking for a match against Hornswoggle tonight. Regal says Vince probably set up Coach to get embarassed last week. Coach says Vince isn't sane anymore, because he things Hornswoggle is a child. By booking the match tonight, Regal is doing a favor to the entire McMahon family, giving them that much more inheritance if Hornswoggle is eliminated. Regal agrees to the match, but Coach says he isn't going to fight Hornswoggle... but Umaga will. Regal thinks about it, and walks away.

Cody Rhodes v. Shelton Benjamin
Shelton starts off wiht a kick to the midsection, and pounds Cody in the corner. Shelton starts working on Cody's left leg, delivering stomps and other impact moves. Rhodes fights back up, but a headlock is countered by Shelton, and Benjamin is in control again. Shelton catches a knee in the stomach, and then hits a bulldog from the corner, garnering a 2 count. Haas distracts Cody, and Shelton goes for a roll-up, but Cody rolls it back over and gets a surprise three count.

Haas and Benjamin hit the ring and start pounding Rhodes, but Hardcore Holly comes in a makes the save. The new team stands tall as the World's Greatest Tag Team make their way out of there.
Winner: Cody Rhodes

D.H. Smith v. Carlito
Carlito up early with a wristlock, but Smith counters, only to get kicked by Carlito. Shoulderblock by Smith, and a huge belly to belly by Smith. Carlito gets on the apron and hits a springboard dropkick, followed by a near-fall. In the corner, Carlito hits Smith HARD. Scoop-slam, and a 2 Count for Carlito. Carlito with a knee stretch to Smith's back, but Smith powers out, only to get caught with a hard clothesline, and a 2 count. Carlito pounds away on Smith, and lock in a headlock. Smith brings Carlito to the corner, gets out, and hits a few dropkicks and a northern lights suplex, but gets a 2 count. Carlito hits a back elbow off the second row, but only gets a two count. Carlito into the turnbuckle, and kicks up to get behind Smith, but gets caught. Smith hits a running powerslam for the win!
Winner: D.H. Smith

Umaga comes down to the ring, accompanied by Coach. He is supposed to take on Hornswoggle. Hornswoggle slides out from under the ring, looking rather reluctant to do this match with Umaga. This should be interesting. Coach keeps telling Hornswoggle to get in the ring. Hornswoggle jumps off the apron and runs up th ramp, as Coach and Umaga look on. Triple H's music hits, and the Game comes out to a huge pop. He makes his way to the ring, with Umaga looking ready. The two start to fight, throwing lefts and rights at each other. Triple H hits a Lou Thesz Press, and starts pounding Umaga. Referees hit the ring and try to pull the two apart, but the two keep fighting.

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William Regal's music hits, and the Raw GM makes his way down to the ring. He promises a great show tonight. Because Randy Orton likes to do things in threes, he'll be facing all of his potential Cyber Sunday opponents 1 on 1 tonight. Orton v. Hardy, Orton v. Kennedy, and Orton v. HBK. So first up, is Orton v. Hardy!

Randy Orton v. Jeff Hardy
Hardy, nursing that neck injury, looks really, really tired. Hardy with an armdrag takedown, but both men are back to their feet. Orton pushes Hardy into the corner, and begins pelting him with fists. Hardy comes back with a series of arm drag takedowns, and now Hardy takes control. A drop kick and a clothesline send Orton outside, and Hardy hits both a baseball slide and a plancha over the top rope to send Orton reeling.

We're back with Orton in control. Hardy gets back to his feet but catches a powerslam. Orton starts stomping away at Hardy, following it up with a knee drop. Orton with a sleeperhold, and Jeff is in trouble. The crowd starts the chant, and Hardy gets back to his feet. Lariat takedown by Hardy, and both men are down. Hardy back up first, and hits a series of clotheslines. Hardy hits the Whispers in the wind, and gets a 2.99999 count. Corner doublestomp by Hardy, and he sets up for the Swanton. Mr. Kennedy interferes and knocks Jeff down. RKO by Orton, and this one is over.
Your Winner: Randy Orton

Santino Marella's music hits, and he and Maria make their way down to the ring. Marella grabs the music and says it's good to be back in Europe. He says the only thing more beautiful than Europe is Maria. Then, he dogs England. Finally, he moves on to trashing "The Condemned," but is interrupted by the music of Val Venis!

Santino Marella v. Val Venis
Val up early, with big punches and an elbow by Venis. Santino puts Val's leg in the ropes, and starts stomping it. Now the two get on the ground and start submission wrestling. Marella with a grapevine on Venis' legs, and a half-crab. Venis makes is way towards, and grabs the rope. Val hits some chops on the chest, but Santino goes after Val's leg again. Venis pushes Santino off and hits him with some back elbows and clotheslines. Santino blocks some moves, but Val finally hits a sunset flip. Santino sits on it, grabs the rope (well, barely), and gets the win.
Your Winner: Santino Marella

In the back, Coach and Carlito are talking, with Coach holding an apple. Carlito brings up Hornswoggle, and asks how did Coach let Hornswoggle beat him with the cane. Coach says he's going to get rid of Hornswoggle tonight, and that he just needs to get him in the right place at the right time. Hornswoggle appears, steals the apple out of Coach's hands, and takes off running.

Randy Orton v. Mr. Kennedy
The two lockup, with Kennedy getting a headlock in early. Orton powers out and reverses, but Kennedy reverses in to a cradle for a 2 count. Kennedy now with a headlock, but gets whipped into the ropes only to hit a shoulderblock on Orton. Orton in control now, but Kennedy fires back. The two go back in forth until Kennedy sidesteps a dropkick by Orton. Kennedy keeps hitting Orton, but Orton hits a low blow and is now in control, delivering stomps and punches to Kennedy. Kennedy grabs the tights and goes for a rollup, but only gets 2. Kennedy goes for the Green Bay Plunge, but Orton jumps out of it and hits an inverted backbreaker. Kennedy gets back up, hits the Green Bay Plunge, and looks to have the win, until Hardy comes out and starts punching Kennedy. Jeff hits a swanton. Orton runs at Hardy, but Hardy pulls the ropes down, and Hardy is left in the ring while the heels both look on in shock.
Your Winner: No Contest

Vince McMahon comes out and pimps out Cyber Sunday while the crowd gives "WHAT" chances. Vince announces Triple H v. Umaga, and introduces Umaga. Vince says one of the stipulations is a street-fight. A Jobber is standing in the corner looking scared. The Jobber says his name is Andy Simmons. Umaga destroys poor little Andy, choking him with cables, and throwing him over the table. Umaga gets a chair, throws it in the ring, and throws Andy in the ring too. Umaga samoan drops Andy on to a table, and Umaga wins. Vince says the other stipulation is a first blood match. The refs throw Andy back in the ring, and Umaga puts Andy in the tree of woe. Umaga bounces off the ropes and hits Andy with a headbutt, and then follows it up with a butt-smash. Vince tells Umaga to finish Andy off. Umaga hits the samoan spike about 10 times, and Andy is bleeding from the mouth. Umaga wins the first blood match easily.

Vince calls for medical attention, because the kid is hurt. Vince tells them to hurry up, and says there's a third stipulation to choose from: a steel cage match. Umaga throws Andy into the ring, and the cage is lowered. Vince calls Andy "Triple H" as he describes everything done to Andy so far.

Umaga gets into the caged ring, and Umaga runs Andy face first into the steel cage. Vince says he wants more. Umaga picks up Andy and runs him into the other side of the cage. Vince keeps telling Umaga to "Sick 'Em." Umaga military presses Andy into the side of the cage. Umaga walks out of the cage the winner. Umaga destroyed this poor kid, and Vince and Umaga have crazy looks on their faces as they go to the back.

Jillian Hall v. Candice Michelle
Jillian cheap shots Candice before she enters the ring, but is soon brought down by the former Women's Champ. Candice hits a spinning kick, and soon hits an Unprettier for the win.
Your Winner: Candice Michelle

Cody Rhodes is in the back, only to be confronted by Hardcore Holly. Holly asks him if he's tired of getting beaten up. Cody says that he can beat Holly, and that he'll earn his respect. Holly says that he's been beating people up since before Cody was born. He then gives Cody a very stiff slap and says that he wants to see Cody fired up. Cody looks furious, and we go to a commercial.

Brian Kendrick v. Rory McAllister
Kendrick goes right into it, taking Rory down and hitting some shots. Rory gets to his feet, but Kendrick beats him down to his knees. Rory rams his head into Kendrick's gut, and then starts to beat the lightweight down. Rory starts to stomp away, and knocks Kendrick to the outside. Kendrick struggles to get back in, and is covered by Rory right away, but Kendrick grabs the ropes. Rory locks in the chin lock, but Kendrick is trying to fight out. Kendrick finally manages to fight out, but Rory hits a knee. Kendrick manages to fight back still, hitting some nice shots. Robbie jumps up on the apron, but is brought down by London. The distraction works, though, as Kendrick is momentarily distracted. Rory takes advantage and hits a springboard reverse suplex for the win.
Your Winner: Rory McAllister

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The following report is courtesy of lordsofpain.net...

We start of with "No Chance" as Vince McMahon makes his way to the ring and grabs a mic. He says that his word is his bond and he proved it last night at No Mercy. Vince shows us a recap of No Mercy, with the WWE Championship on the line three times, eventually ending up in the hands of the Legend Killer. Back in the ring, Vince says that history will be made once again tonight, if for no other reason than that every WWE superstar will come out at the same time to shake the hand of Randy Orton. VKM says that Randy's first title defense will be at Cyber Sunday. Vince is interrupted by the music of Triple H. Vince tells HHH to calm down, as the Game stalks Vince around the ring. HHH tells Vince to shut up, and says that nobody cares about Cyber Sunday. They care about tonight, so he's invoking his rematch clause. Vince tells HHH to be careful what he wishes for, but tonight, Triple H gets his rematch. Vince stops, and says, while that's true, it's a handicap match, with Triple H against Randy Orton and his tag-team partner, Umaga.

Beth Phoenix, Melina, and Jillian v. Candice Michelle, Mickie James, and Maria
Melina starts things off by assaulting Maria, but Maria counters and tags in Mickie, who hits a baseball slide dropkick. Mickie finds herself tangled up in the ropes, so Melina gets the upper hand and begins delivering vicious kicks to the side. Melina tags in Beth, and Beth delivers a modified knee drop, tagging in Jillian, who makes a quick tag to melina, and they doubleteam mickie. Melina with a 2 count, and works Mickie with a leglock, only to get kicked away. Mickie misses an enziguiri, and Jillian comes in, but Mickie fights both off and gets the hot tag to Candice. Candice with clotheslines, clearing the ring. Northern lights suplex gets a two count, when Beth Phoenix interferes. Maria and Mickie james throw Beth out of the ring, but Beth grabs Mickie on the way out and powerbombs her on the outside. Jillian in the ring has Candice in the corner, but Candice gets on Jillian's shoulders and hits a victory roll for the win!
Your Winners: Candice, Mickie, and Maria

Coach is in the back with Regal. Coach says a lesser man wouldn't be here, but he doesn't feel sorry for what happened to John Cena. Coach is now walking with a cane. Coach asks about the photos, and the camera shows photos of Elton John, Queen Elizabeth, and George Michael. Coach says all three are Queens, much to Regal's chagrin. VKM shows up and asks Regal if he's taking care of Hornswoggle. Regal says Hornswoggle is napping, but is a little darling. Vince says that Hornswoggle is Regal's responsibility now. Regal tells Coach to check on Hornswoggle. When Coach opens the door, he says Hornswoggle isn't there. Regal blames Coach for losing him, and sends Coach to go find him.

Santino Marella v. Val Venis
Val Venis is looking heavier these days. Santino immediately gets out of the ring and grabs the mic from Lilian Garcia. He introduces Lilian and says her band will be playing tonight. Marella says he can't fight Venis tonight, he's got a previous engagement. He says that William Regal has a formidable substitute opponent, and Snitsky's music hits.

The bell rings, and Snitsky goes right after Val's knee. Snitsky throws Val into the corner and continues working that bad knee with stomps and kicks. Huge slam by Snitsky, followed by an elbow drop. Val starts to get some offense in, but kicks Snitsky with his bad leg, which causes him to pause and tend to it. Val catches a big boot, and after a double underhook vice, Snitsky puts the pumphandle slam on Venis for the win.
Your Winner: Snitsky

John Cena is live via satellite. He says it will be 7-12 months before he comes back, and that it was painful, but he's not thinking about it: just getting back in the ring. After being asked about Orton's comments last night, Cena says it's better to fight and lose than to not fight at all. Orton should not worry about Cena, but about HHH, and every WWE Superstar. JR thanks Cena, and the interview wraps up.

Orton's music hits, and the Champ comes out for the handicap match that Vince announced earlier.

Orton and Umaga v. Triple H
HHH attacks Umaga, but Orton jumps in and both men are attacking the Game. Orton goes for the RKO early but HHH pushes Orton into Umaga, sending the Bulldozer outside of the ring. HHH with a DDT on Orton, and a 2 count, but Umaga pulls HHH out and throws him into the guard rail. Umaga pounds away on HHH and throws him back in the ring. Both men assault Triple H; Orton then mounts HHH and sends punches to the Games head. HHH is busted open. Headbutt splash by Umaga. Two on one, as Umaga throws Triple H into a dropkick by Orton. Orton now holds HHH while Umaga hits him with punches. Samoan drop by Umaga, and Orton directs Umaga to the top rope. HHH kicks Orton into Umaga, who crashes from the top rope. HHH with a facebuster on Orton, but as he sets up for the pedigree, Umaga interferes. HHH sends umaga to the outside, and gets ready for the pedigree on Orton, but Umaga runs back in with a chair and gets DQ'd when he hits the Game.

The Game is out, as both men assault him, ending with Orton hitting an RKO, and Umaga setting Triple H up for a butt-smash as Orton leaves. HHH gets hit with 2 butt-smashes, and Umaga goes to the top rope and hits a big splash. A Samoan spike puts an exclamation point on it, and the crowd is hating every minute of this. Refs come and try to carry him away, but HHH pushes them away, and the King of Kings tries to walk back on his own. He falls on the ramp, and Raw goes to a commercial with Triple H being assisted by the refs.

London and Kendrick v. Highlanders
Rory starts out against London, pounding him with firsts, but London strikes back, attacking both Highlanders and hitting a kick that sends Rory out of the ring. Kendrick and London go over the ropes and hit both Highlanders. Rory strikes London back in the ring now, and Robbie gets tagged in and has the advantage. Rory is tagged back in, and holds London in a reverse chinlock. London powers out and hits an armdrag, and Rory tags Robbie, followed by a hot tag from London to Kendrick. Kendrick with a series of flying moves, and Kendrick gets a two count. Rory gets thrown from the ring when he tries to interfere, and London hits a moonsault on the outside. In the ring, Robbie catched Kendrick in the corner, and gets his feet on the ropes. The ref doesn't see it, so the Highlanders get a cheap victory.
Your Winners: The Highlanders

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Thanks to wrestlezone.com for the following report... 

- Three unknown men are in the ring dressed in wrestling attire, as Vince McMahon makes his way to the ring. He says a main event worth being on WrestleMania will take place tonight: Triple H vs. Mr. McMahon. McMahon says he guarantees victory, he says actions speak louder than words. Vince then shows a video package of every time he has beaten or gotten the best of Triple H. He says the three men represent three different fighting styles; one is an amateur wrestler, one is a karate champion and the other is a sumo champion. Vince says he is going to put on a demonstration. He takes off his jacket and tie; the three men get ready to compete, Vince then backs off and brings out Umaga to take on the guys. Umaga demolishes them all easily. He has a new huge tattoo on his back.

6 Man Tag Team Match " Intercontinental Champion Jeff Hardy, Brian Kendrick & Paul London vs. Shelton Benjamin and World Tag Team Champions Lance Cade & Trevor Murdoch
The babyfaces have the advantage early, heels soon take control, Hardy tagged in and dominates Cade. London takes out Benjamin on the outside, Kendrick knocks down Murdoch and hits the Sliced Bread #2 on Cade, Hardy then hits the Swanton on Cade for the victory.

- Randy Orton is with us via satellite. He says he opted not to be at Raw tonight due to Cena’s current state of mind. We are shown the footage of Randy attacking Mr. Cena. Orton says “like father, like son.” He finishes by telling the fans the next time they see him on Raw, he will be WWE Champion.

- A video package of the WWE Diva hopefuls competing in an Obstacle Course is shown.

- Backstage William Regal is looking for Hornswoggle. He runs into The Highlanders and asks them why they turned down a match against London & Kendrick tonight. They said the only match they are interested in is a match for the World Tag Team Championships. Rory says they came to the WWE to become Tag Champs, and that’s what they are going to do whether Regal likes it or not.

Cody Rhodes vs. Hardcore Holly
Holly sneaks in an Alabama Slam for the victory, Holly stares at Cody for a while before shaking his head and walking away.

- Beth Phoenix makes her way to the ring, Lilian goes to leave but Beth stops and asks her to have a practice at announcing Beth as the new Women’s Champio., Lilian does but adds “assuming you can beat Candice” on the end of it. Beth grabs Lilian by the throat, Candice Michelle makes the save and knocks Beth from the ring, both women stare each other down.

Mr. McMahon vs. Triple H
Before Triple H comes out, McMahon shows the video of Triple H taking out Umaga with the sledgehammer last month. McMahon cuts H’s entrance short and yells to get on with fighting, McMahon realizes there is no referee so he yells for one, out comes Carlito with a referee shirt on, he will be the official. McMahon slaps H before the bell rings. The match officially starts and Vince keeps running from the ring, H eventually catches Vince and pummels him on the outside, Carlito gets in H’s face and shoves him, H shoves him back and puts McMahon in the ring, he goes for the Pedigree but Carlito hits the Backstabber on HHH, he puts Vince on top and tries to fast count H down but he manages to kick out. Triple H then low blows Vince and attacks Carlito, Carlito disqualifies HHH giving Vince the win for the 2nd week in a row.

Umaga makes his way to the ring and he and HHH go at it, Umaga eventually gets the advantage hitting HHH with his running turnbuckle move, Umaga seta up H for the Samoan Spike but Carlito decides to knock H from the ring, Umaga is angry with Carlito and yells at him, Carlito backs up the ramp allowing H time to recover, he has his sledgehammer in hand, Umaga looks to not be backing down but Vince persuades him to leave it until No Mercy. Triple H is stood in the ring yelling at Vince and Umaga.

- Todd Grisham interviews John Cena backstage, he acknowledges what some fans say about him (We’ve Cena Nuff and Cena Sucks) Cena says “they” can say what they like. At No Mercy he will not stay down, no matter what Orton hits him with he will keep getting up and at No Mercy he will give them something “they” won’t forget.

Melina vs. Mickie James
Melina has the advantage, she sets up Mickie for a reverse-DDT but starts screaming, we then see it’s because Hornswoggle has popped his head up through the ring skirt, this distraction allows Mickie to roll up Melina for the win. After the match Melina chases Hornswoggle under the ring, they are under there for a few seconds until Hornswoggle comes out the other side with Melina’s top in his hands! He then goes back under and Melina can be heard screaming from under the ring, he then comes back out with Melina’s wrestling tights! Hornswoggle skips away up the ramp as Melina has her head popped out the side of the ring skirt screaming at Hornswoggle to give her her clothes back!

WWE Champion John Cena vs. Mr. Kennedy
Cena wins with the STFU. After the match Randy Orton appears behind Cena and RKO’s him, he then takes Cena to the outside and hits him with the steel steps. He then puts Cena on the announce table and RKO’s him on it, Cena rolls onto the floor, Orton gets in Cena’s face and yells 1 to 10, Cena fails to respond. Orton gets in the ring and stares down at Cena with a sadistic look.

The following report is courtesy of lordsofpain.net...

Jonathan Coachman is already in the ring. Blue-shirted Security surrounds the ring. A recap of the events from the past few weeks is shown. He introduces Mr. McMahon and he struts down to the ring.

McMahon gets on the mic and says he is tired of Triple H. Every week he makes a fool out of McMahon. So tonight, Triple H will face Carlito in a Steel Cage. But Carlito won't be alone. He will be teaming up...with Vincent Kennedy McMahon. He vows to win that match.

He then calls out his son Hornswaggle. Vince gets on one knee and apologizes to Hornswaggle. They say they love each other, and they hug. McMahon also has a surprise for Hornswaggle. He has set up a date for him. With Melina! Melina comes down and says she thinks he's really cute. Hornswaggle jumps on her and rolls around. McMahon tells them to go out and get a beer.

Coach says even though Regal is set to come back next week, he thinks McMahon should make him permanent GM. Then Cena's music hits. Cena comes down to the ring and he looks like he means business. He starts throwing chairs into the ring. Coach says if he touches himself or McMahon, Cena will be stripped of the WWE title. Cena attacks both of them.

McMahon says there will be a ceremony tonight, and it's up to Coach whether or not Cena will keep the title.

Match One: Cody Rhodes vs. Hardcore Holly
Holly talks a little trash before the match gets under way. He says Cody has to earn his respect. The bell rings. They lock up, side headlock by holly. Off the ropes, shoulder tackle. Top wristlock by Cody Rhodes. Armdrag takeover by Cody. Attempt at a sunset flip, Holly tries to punch out of it, but Cody gets a 2 count. Chops in the corner from Holly. They exchange rights but Holly gets the better of the exchange. More chops. Snapmare into a chinlock. Some elbows from Cody but a clubbing blow from Holly. Back suplex attmpt by Holly by Cody lands on his feet. Side russian legsweep and a nearfall. Crossbody block from Cody. 2 count, clothesline. Dropkick. Holly blocks Cody in the corner. Cody attempts a springboard move but Holly tosses him aside. Alabama Slam. And the 1,2,3.
Winner: Hardcore Holly

Match Two: Santino Marella vs Ron Simmons
They lock up and Santino forces the break in the corner. Some rights from Simmons A lot of them. irish whip, Santino drops down and rolls out of the ring. Simmons follows him outside but Santino runs and stomps Simmons upon entering the ring. Drops some elbows and knees on the back of Ron Simmons. Locks on a modified camel clutch. Some clubbing forearms to the back of Ron Simmons. Santino attempts to irish whip Simmons. Santino ducks the clothesline. Shoulder tackle by Simmons. Clothesline. Simmong goes for a powerslam but Santino slips out and leaves the ring. He grabs Maria and just leaves.
Winner: Ron Simmons by count out

Backstage, Melina is texting and Jillian approaches her. She says Hornswaggle is a disgusting midget. Melina confesses that Coach said that if she went on a date with him, she'd get a Women's Title shot.

Match thre: Triple H vs Carlito and Mr. McMahon in a Steel Cage
McMahon and Carlito discuss their gameplan before entering the cage. Carlito and Mcmahon approach Triple H. Carlito runs at him and McMAhon hightails it. Triple H grabs McMahon but both them beat him down. He fights them off. He works on Carlito and McMAhon tries to escape the door. Carlito attacks Trips from behind. McMahon tries to climb out of the cage. Trips pulls him off the ropes and crotches him on the top rope

Carlito and HHH fight back and forth. McMahon is still out of it. High knee from Triple H. Knee lift. Carlito is down. Triple H slams McMAhon into the cage a couple times. He then throws Carlito into McMahon into the Cage. HHH crotchchops McMahon and goes for the Pedigree but receives a Backstabber for his troubles. McMAhon crawls for the cage. HHH throws Carlito into the cage. Triple H drags McMAhon into the ring at the last second. Carlito is on the attack again. Vince is now trying to climb out of the cage again. Triple H and McMahon fight it out on the top briefly, but ultimately, Carlito grabs Triple H's leg and McMahon makes it out.
Winners:Carlito and Mr. McMahon

Match Four: Cade and Murdoch vs London and Kendrick
Backbreaker from Cade on London. Tags in Murdoch. Murdoch drops some knees on London. Abdominal stretch. Lodong fights out and hits a hurricanrana. He tags in Kendrick and Kendrick goes wild. Dropkicks, backboby drop, leg lariat. Nearfall. Plancha from London onto Cade. Sliced Bread #2 on Murdoch. 1,2, but the Highlanders attack London and Kendrick.
Winners: London and Kendrick by DQ

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The following report is courtesy of lordsofpain.net...

John Cena makes his way down to the ring and grabs the mic. He says that he knows some people are upset with him; that he hasn't been himself lately. He says he's sorry, and although he's had alot of pent up aggression lately, tonight he feels fabulous. The Champ says everything is going to be okay, because last night he lost to Randy Orton. Cena says thank you to his Dad, for being brave and making him the proudest son on the face of the earth. He also thanks Randy Orton, because Orton has made him put into perspective the things in life that are important, and that he's stupid enough to want a rematch. The most important Thank You is to Jonathan Coachman, who booked the last man standing match at No Mercy. While he's talking about No Mercy, Coach's music hits!

Coach says Cena shouldn't be thanking him for making that match, he should be thanking him that he still has a job after his father attacked a WWE Superstar and Cena put his hands on him. Coach says just like Cena feels he got revenge last night, Coach is allowing Orton to feel the same. Tonight, Orton vs. Cena, right here, tonight! Coach met with Cena's father this morning, and informed him that he may have stripping Cena of the title. Cena's father pleaded with Coach not to do it, and told Coach that he'd do anything to prevent Cena from losing the title. Coach then says that tonight, it's not Randy Orton vs. the Champ John Cena, it's Randy Orton vs. Mr. Cena, John's Father! Cena is beside himself as Raw goes to a commercial...

Jeff Hardy (c) v. Shelton Benjamin, for the IC Title
Back and forth and then Shelton in control over Hardy in the ring. Hardy starts to power out but gets caught with a face first back drop by Shelton. Hardy now down in the corner, and is hit with a running knee to the face by Shelton. Neckbreaker by Benjamin gets a 2 count, and follows that ujp with a few headbutts and a sleeperhold. Jeff powers out, but Shelton catches him once again, and gets a 2 count. Jeff stumbles to his feet, and ducks when Shelton goes for a kick. Both men clothesline each other, get an 8 count before they get back up. Hardy hits the whisper in the wind, and goes for the twist of fate, but Shelton gets out of it and hits a backbreaker for another 2 count. Shelton in the corner, but moves, and Jeff goes face first into the turnbuckle, only to turn around and be caught in a russian legsweep. Then, Shelton hits a reverse DDT on Hardy for yet another 2 count. Hardy to the top rope, Shelton pounces up there, but gets pushed off, and Jeff follows up with a Swanton for the win.
Winner: Jeff Hardy

Next, we have Vince McMahon in a limo. Coach gets in the limo and tells Vince that it's going to be a great night. Vince doesn't care; he only cares about his predicament. Coach says it's not going to last much longer; he's taken care of everything, and after tonight, Vince won't have to worry about him anymore. They show Hornswoggle in a car-seat, and Vince says he has to sit there because he's an infant, and that's the law. Hornswoggle gets out of the seat and chases Coach out of the Limo. Pretty funny segment.

Then we have Santino outside of the Diva's locker room. Jillian Hall comes out, and they put in a plug for the Condemned, and say something about Britney Spears. Then Santino says he can't believe he used to pleasure himself to Britney Spears.

Vince and Coach are walking in the back when they hear irish music playing. Vince says it's coming from his office; Vince's office is covered in Irish stuff. Vince says this was all on Coach. Coach says that when he finds him, he'll handle this. Vince tells Coach to find him. Hornswoggle shows up in the background, says "hi Dad!" and takes off running. Coach runs after him. Now, there's a Horse with a Unicorn attachment.

Daivari v. Hacksaw Jim Duggan
Daivari goes for his flag, but Hacksaw pulls him down and delivers a bodyslam to Daivari. Daivari stops Hacksaw from getting the US flag, and then starts pounding away on Duggan. Daivari goes for the flag, but Hacksaw stops him again by holding his legs. This time, Daivari gets all the way to the top, but Hacksaw pulls him down and Daivari racks himself on the turnbuckle. Duggan heads over to his flag, and Daivari meets him at the top rope. Hacksaw knocks Daivari from the top turnbuckle to the outside of the ring, and grabs the flag for the victory!
Winner: Hacksaw Jim Duggan

In the back, Cody Rhodes begs Coach to let him fight Orton instead of Cena's father. Coach says no, and walks away, only to run face first into Cena. Cena says if he doesn't call off the match, he will not be held responsible for what happens tonight. Coach says that Cena will have a match tonight, against an opponent of Coach's choice. If Cena wins, he'll cancel the match between Orton and his father. Cena's fate is in his hands.

After the break, Vince's music hits and the chairman comes down to the ring and grabs a mic. He says that we are all surprised that his grapefruits produced Hornswoggle. He says that he doesn't want us to think he's not proud of his new son, and that he's compassionate. He says he wants to welcome his new son into his family, and he wants us to do the same. Vince introduces Hornswoggle, who comes down to the ring with an Irish jig theme song. He dances around the ring, and Vince is annoyed, telling him repeatedly to stop dancing. Vince asks if he's happy to be a McMahon. Vince says that when, if, he dies, that Hornswoggle will come into a lot of money. Vince tells him that money is not everything, and that life is really about love and compassion. Vince will open his heart tonight and do something that Hornswoggle will appreciate. Vince tells him that he has some legal papers, and that he's putting Hornswoggle up for adoption. Hornswoggle looks crushed.

Vince announces the new parents, who come out to the ring with an attorney. Alice and Ed are their names, apparently. Ed says that they've waited years for a little boy, and that Hornswoggle is everything Vince said he'd be. Alice says that they'll love Hornswoggle so much. Hornswoggle looks like he's about to cry. Vince tells him, rather cruelly, to say hello to his new dad. Hornswoggle pulls Ed's pants down, and begins to attack him. Ed ditches the ring, and Vince tells him to come back and sign the legal papers. Vince tries to tell Alice that Hornswoggle has never done something like this before, but the little guy attacks Alice from behind, biting her in the...well...behind. Ed and Alice run away with their lawyer close behind. Vince flips out on Hornswoggle, telling him to get out of his life, and to stay away from him. He then tells Hornswoggle to crawl back under his rock. Hornswoggle slowly walks up the ramp, crying. Vince tells the crowd that they would have done the same thing in that position.

Suddenly, Triple H's music hits, and the Game looks like he's got something to say. Vince asks what he's doing here. Triple H says that Vince seems mad that he's out here, considering he went through a lot of trouble to decorate Vince's office. He says it's not easy to find a unicorn in Nashville. He says that he knew Vince slept with some trolls in his day, but he didn't know Vince slept with elves, fairies, and hobgoblins too. Vince says that he doesn't sleep with fairies, to which Triple H replies that's not what he read on the internet. He wonders why Vince didn't see this coming, seeing as Vince is short-tempered, short-sighted, and has a microscopic penis. Vince asks if he's finished, and Triple H says that's what Hornswoggle's mom said to Vince. He asks if Vince did it with Hornswoggle's mom on the Yellow Brick Road or if he got her to Smurf Village first. He says that Vince is obviously upset, and that he just has one quick question. He asks Vince if Hornswoggle's mom was magically delicious. Vince says that he's got some problems, but not as big as Triple H's. Vince introduces Triple H's opponents for the night...Cade and Murdoch. We go to break as Cade and Murdoch make their way to the ring.

Triple H vs. Cade and Murdoch
We come back from the break to Murdoch with a side headlock on Triple H. Triple H is fighting out, but Murdoch manages to tag Cade, and they try a double team. Triple H lands a clothesline to both Cade and Murdoch and tosses both men out of the ring. Carlito now comes out and stands at the top of the entrance ramp. Cade manages to hit a swinging neckbreaker, and works over Triple H a little, before tagging in Murdoch. After a double team move Murdoch pounds away on Triple H, hitting some nice shots in the corner. Murdoch climbs the ropes, and hits a move that a man of his stature shouldn't do. Murdoch tags in Cade, who works on Triple H some more, eventually locking in a neck vice.

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