The following Smackdown report is courtesy of lordsofpain.net...

Ric Flair def. Carlito by submission. Standard back and forth match, finish came when Carlito BADLY missed a dropkick (he practically stuck his leg out for Flair to catch), allowing Flair to counter into the figure four. Carlito reached the ropes, but Flair pulled Carlito back into the middle of the ring, dropped a few shots on the knee, and re-applied the figure four for the win.

Matt Hardy def. Lance Cade by pinfall. Matt Hardy had the second-biggest face pop of the night, second only to Batista. He hits the Twist of Fate to gain the pinfall on Cade.

Chavo Guerrero def. Jamie Noble and Funaki by pinfall in a Triple Threat match to retain the WWE Cruiserweight Title. Can someone remind us when the heck did either Noble or Funaki earn a title shot? And why wasn't Jimmy Wang Yang even in the mix? Chavo actually got a few face chants in Texas, and eventually scored the win with a Gory Bomb on Funaki.

Edge is backstage with Vickie Guerrero in Teddy Long's office. Long isn't in the house tonight, and Edge threatens not to participate in the match at all. Vickie assures Edge that the match tonight is non-title, and Edge accepts but is officially under protest.

Deuce & Domino (w/ Cherry) def. Cryme Tyme by pinfall. JTG played the face in peril for most of the match. Shad Gaspar cleans house for a while, until Cherry distracts the ref as Cryme Tyme attempt their neckbreaker combo finisher. Domino low-bridges JTG outside of the ring, allowing Deuce to roll-up Gaspar with a handful of jeans for the win. After the match, Deuce & Domino stayed in the ring to celebrate, but the camera cut backstage to Cryme Tyme discovering the unguarded car that Deuce & Domino drove out to the ring. Cryme Tyme hotwires the car and takes off, as the heels take off in pursuit on foot.

Kane def. MVP by pinfall. MVP takes a chapter out of "How To Win Friends And Influence People" by saying he's a better baller than either Tim Duncan or Tony Parker of the San Antonio Spurs. Instant over-the-top heel heat. Kane pretty much dominated most of the match with his power. MVP stunned Kane in the corner and went for his running kick, but Kane caught the boot coming in. It also got MVP off balance to where Kane quickly planted the chokeslam to get the win.

Mickie James and Victoria are talking backstage as to who is the better WWE Diva of them. James challenges Victoria to kiss the next man who walks through the door. Howard Finkel comes in, and walks past the ladies, as Victoria states that she wasn't warmed up yet. Next man through the door is Hacksaw Jim Duggan. He walks through the doorway past the ladies, as Victoria complains that Duggan was going too fast to kiss. Victoria then challenges Mickie James to try it herself. The doorway opens to - Oily Fat Guy. Fortunately for Mickie, he is cut off by Ron Simmons who gets through the doorway first and gets a wet kiss from Mickie. Oily Fat Guy does his dance for Simmons, getting the requisite response -- DAMN!

Mickie James def. Victoria by pinfall. Victoria misses a moonsault, allowing Mickie to roll her up for the pin.

Great Khali def. Eugene by pinfall. Chop to the head, choke bomb, pinfall. Thank God we didn't have to watch Khali in the ring for more than 30 seconds.

Batista def. Edge by pinfall. The two biggest pyros in the WWE face off. Decent matchup, but everyone in the building knew the ending before it happened. Batista countered one spear into a spinebuster, the second spear attempt was countered by a well-timed leapfrog to where Edge's head wound up between Batista's legs, setting Edge up for the Batista Bomb, and the victory for Batista.