The Think Tank: Maybe Jerry Lawler Was Right

By Pete Ellis

Everybody's thinking it, so I'm just gonna go ahead and say it:

The new ECW sucks more then a fat chick on a blind date!

Quote me on that, kids, I don't care. I'm tired of pretending it isn't that bad and I'm tired of waiting for it to get better. I LOVE WRESTLING. I can't get enough, but this Tuesday night joint smells like failure.

No Dudley Boyz, no Paul Heyman, and now guys like RVD and Sabu are jobbing for non-ECW competitors. Know what I liked about the old ECW? Everything had a point, every match had a story and nobody was invincible.

Now ECW is like last decade's RAW. Kurt Angle, Test, The Big Show. Haven't I seen this before? Huh? What? What do you mean all three of those guys are gone.?

Okay, so it's not all bad. Kelly Kelly is pretty damn hot. CM Punk looks like he'll be around for awhile, and watching Lashley crash through that cage wall was pretty sweet.

But here's my beef: The "extreme rules" matches are few and far between, and they aren't that extreme. The biggest stars on ECW aren't from ECW, and everything that once made ECW different has been replaced by everything that makes it just like the other guys.

McMahon should have handed Heyman the keys and told him to send back a check once in awhile. I promise you we'd be watching D-Von and Bubba put a bloody and broken RVD through a flaming table while Sabu staples one of his arms back on in front of a topless Kelly Kelly while fans scrap for lost teeth in the first three rows. Now THAT'S entertainment.

ECW is basically an extra hour for the WWE to showcase it's RAW and Smackdown athletes. The "Extremists" are not extreme, the "ECW Originals" have become quite mainstream, and "hardcore" has been replaced by soft-porn. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go take it off of my TiVo.

Fix it or F*%k it!