Hulkamania Wants to Run Wild on Orton: RAW Results, 8-15-06

The following report is courtesy of lordsofpain.net …

The show opened with Lillian Garcia introducing WWE Champion Edge, who came out to the ring with Lita. Meanwhile, JR and King spoke of some disturbing news reported on wwe.com earlier today (involving Edge and Lita going to John Cena’s parent’s house). Edge took the mic and said that the “champ is here.” The former champ, not so much. He said he wanted to tell us a story, as the crowd chanted for Cena.

He said the story was about a champion, him, that was stressed out over having to face Cena at Summerslam and being able to lose the belt via DQ. Edge informed us that he’d be facing Carlito later tonight, so all that being said…he’d been very busy. Thus, he and Lita decided to take a joy ride earlier today to the home of John Cena. Edge showed footage of him and Lita in the Cena house. He insulted Cena’s wrestling skills and wiped his nose on Cena’s Larry Bird throwback jersey. They perused the home and talked to Mr. Cena. Edge said that he told Cena’s dad that he was going to beat the hell out of his son. He also smacked the hell out of him.

They showed the footage of Edge slapping John’s dad several times. JR said it was pathetic, while Edge commented on Cena being at home w/ his dad. He then gave us a history lesson, taking us back to Wrestlemania 21 (where he won the MITB ladder match to get a shot at the belt), New Year’s Revolution (where he won the belt), Live Sex on TV that brought really strong ratings, the Royal Rumble rematch where Cena regained the title, Edge regaining the title on Raw, Cena sitting at home nursing his dad back to health, and the final chapter w/ a happy ending that’ll see Edge retain at Summerslam.

Match 1: Women’s Champion Mickie James vs. Lita (w/ Edge)
- Lita got first strike points with a headlock and a hurricanrana. She maintained control in the corner, hammering away on the champion. Mickie came back and mounted Lita for several right handed shots. James then connected with a dropkick and headed to the top rope. Lita recovered, though, and threw Mickie back to the mat via the hair. She then draped Mickie’s neck across the bottom rope and came down on it with her knee. James tried for a comeback, but Lita thwarted it with a side-Russian leg sweep. The challenger proceeded to lock in a surf board stretch.

James rolled through and kicked Lita in the face. Edge looked concerned as Mickie drilled Lita with a flying forearm and a running back elbow. She then hit a hurricanrana of her own and clothesline for a near fall. Lita came back with a rake of the eyes and tried for a spike DDT, but Mickie held onto the ropes and caused Lita to throw herself to the mat. Mickie tried for a pin with the ropes as leverage, but Edge threw her legs off. Lita tried the same thing, but the ref caught her. Mickie tried for a roll-up with a bridge, but Lita kicked out! Lita then countered the Mickie James DDT finish and took advantage of an Edge distraction by drilling Mickie with the championship belt. Thus, Lita became the new Women’s champion at 5:03.

Backstage, Mick Foley congratulated Lita on winning the Women’s title. He said he’d been very upset with himself for the last week for accepting Ric Flair’s challenge. He said he was comforted only by the fact that he’d get to destroy Flair’s career at Summerslam. Foley said that the facts state that he’d only been busted open 4 times in his ten year WWE career, whereas Ric was a bleeding machine. Thus, may one of them bleed to death at Summerslam. He invited Flair to come to ECW tomorrow night. He concluded by saying that he’d look forward to seeing Melina accompany her man, Johnny Nitro when he faces Flair later tonight.Match 2: Umaga (w/ Armando Alejandro Estrada) vs. Alex Sage
- Umaga dominated the jobber with his usual offense before getting the win with the Samoan Spike. Umaga got the squash victory.

Match 3: Intercontinental Champion Johnny Nitro (w/ Melina) vs. Ric Flair
- A lock-up started us off, with Nitro backing Flair into the corner and whaling away on him. Flair fought back quickly with a few chops, and then caught Johnny’s foot when he tried to come back with a kick to the gut. Nitro hit an enziguiri and regained control. The IC Champ maintained momentum with simplistic offense until Flair came back with chops and a back elbow. Nitro connected on a back elbow of his own, though, and followed with a body slam. Johnny then went to the top and tried for a corkscrew moonsault, but Flair moved out of the way.

Flair gave the champion a chop block, but Foley came down to ringside and eventually threw Ric into the steel ring steps. He tried to toss the steps at Flair’s head, but the Nature Boy moved out of the way. Foley continued and concluded his attack with a few forearm shots. Mick, Nitro, and Melina walked to the back. Nitro and Flair wrestled to a no-contest at 2:44.

The WWE Diva Search contestants and Mike Mizanin came to the ring for the 5th elimination, bringing us down to just three contestants. Milena was eliminated, she said her goodbyes, and then Candice, Torrie, and Victoria came to the ring for the “Beat the Heat Water Fight.” The WWE Divas won the contest.

Shawn Michaels and HHH came to the ring. Shawn was wearing the new DX shirt, while Trips was wearing the classic one. HHH took the mic as the crowd went wild. A DX chant rang out thru the arena. Trips motioned for everyone to calm down and asked the crowd if they were ready. The usual DX schtick followed, except that Triple H implied that “Sucking it” was Vince’s favorite activity. Shawn took the mic and said that the last few weeks haven’t been too good for DX, specifically citing his night in prison.

He said that the McMahons, though, had forgotten one important thing about DX … there are two things that separate them from everyone else in the industry. They do what they want, whenever they want. For instance, they have a seemingly insatiable need to make fun of Vince’s love of…at which point, they revealed a new t-shirt, reading “Vince Loves…” and displaying a picture of a rooster (a cock, as it were). The McMahons had enough and came out to the top of ramp with some police officers in tow. Shane said they were known for sophomoric pranks and getting systemically taken out by the McMahons. He had footage shown of HBK and HHH getting beaten down after their matches w/ Umaga, of course, at the hands of the McMahons.

Vince took the mic and said that the McMahons would be partying after Summerslam and the DX’s party was going to be over. A “You Suck Cock” chant rang out, directed at Vince. VKM continued by talking about HBK and HHH having big names in the wrestling business, but no one having a bigger name than his and Shane’s. Vince talked of having unlimited resources to take care of business and bring the wrath of Satan upon them. Trips interrupted him and reminded him that they were DX, consisting of HBK and HHH…the Showstopper, the Icon, the Cerebral Assassin, the King of Kings…the worst nightmare of the McMahons…Degeneration X.

At Summerslam, HHH said, they are going to kick their ass. He said they don’t care who they bring to Summerslam, even if it be Satan himself, for they will look anyone right in the eye and tell them the same thing they’re about to tell the McMahons…and that is that they have two words for them… “SUCK IT!”

Match 4: World Tag Champs The Spirit Squad vs. Eugene and Hacksaw Jim Duggan
-Duggan started off against Mikey and gave him a body slam. Kenny tried to get involved, but he and Mikey got their heads smashed together for their troubles. Interference from the Squad members ensued, causing Duggan to get knocked out of the ring. As the Squad taunted Eugene and Duggan, the Highlanders came to ringside to give help to the faces.

Meanwhile, Kenny and Mikey maintained momentum and worked over Duggan. Hacksaw came back with a clothesline and made the tag to Eugene, who came in and gave a Rock Bottom to Mikey and an airplane spin to Kenny. Mikey and Eugene bumped heads. Johnny proceeded to catch Eugene with a spinning wheel kick off the top rope. The Highlanders then came into the ring and gave Mikey the Scot Drop. The finish came when Eugene and Duggan won at 3:21.

A video highlight package hyping the return of Jeff Hardy was shown.

Match 5: WWE Champion Edge (w/ Lita) vs. Carlito (w/ Trish)
- Carlito went to work immediately with a series of right hands and a back elbow smash. He followed with a snap suplex, but Edge poked him in the eye. Carlito came back with a boot to the face and a running clothesline before catching the champion with a knife-edge chop. He then caught him with a hard Irish whip into the turnbuckle. CCC stayed on the offensive with a body slam and a running leg drop. Edge regained some momentum with a shot to the gut.

He tried to back body drop him over the top rope, but Carlito held onto the top rope and landed on the apron. CCC proceeded to ram Edge’s face into the turnbuckle and follow with a beautiful springboard corkscrew Senton. Edge rolled out of the ring to try to recover and we, meanwhile, got a dreaded commercial mid-match commercial break (to be expected). Back from the break, Edge had taken control. He connected on an elbow drop. During the break, Edge had countered Carlito’s high risk from the top rope with a dropkick in mid-air. Edge locked his arms around Carlito’s sternal area. Carlito tried to fight out of it, but Lita got involved. Trish drilled Lita in retaliation.

Carlito took advantage and hit a running knee lift and springboard back elbow. He then tried for a springboard moonsault and landed on his feet before catching a running Edge in a hurricanrana. Edge regained momentum with the formerly named Edge-O-Matic, but Carlito eventually came back and tried for the Back Cracker. Edge countered and hit the Spear, but John Cena came down to the ring and tried to tear Edge apart. Carlito and Edge fought to a no-contest at 9:47.

Randy Orton came to the ring in his wrestling gear. It’s only about 9:55 CT, so plenty of time for Hogan to show. Orton said that he has been waiting all night for Hogan to show up and face him like a man, but he’s not here. He said that if one word could describe Hogan’s decision not to show up tonight, it’d be “smart.” Hogan knows best, Orton said, and it was a good decision for him to back out of coming here tonight. Orton had the video highlight package that was shown earlier played again.

Back to live TV, Randy said he had a secret to share with the Hulkster. He said that Hogan was his inspiration for becoming the Legend Killer in the first place, as he used to sit back and watch all the mindless idiots cheer for Hogan…Orton simply never got that. So, he wanted to be the man that killed Hulkamania…the man that destroyed Hulkamania forever. Needless to say, this Sunday is what Orton considers his chance to kill the greatest Legend that there ever was. At that point, a fake Hulk Hogan came to the ring. It was the same fake Hogan from a few weeks ago.

The fake Hogan did some posing in the ring. Orton looked puzzled, but confident as the fake Hogan cut a mock promo on how Randy was exactly right…Orton was going to kill the legend of Hulk Hogan, but not because of Randy…rather, it’s because he hurt his knee on the couch. He asked Orton what he was going to do when Hulkamania soiled itself all over you. The real Hulk Hogan had enough, though, and finally made his rumored appearance. He slowly made his way to the ring. Orton attacked the Hulkster as he tried to get in the ring, but once Hogan made it to his feet, he no sold Randy’s offense and gave him a big boot to the face. Fake Hogan slapped Hulk on the back.

Hogan then embarrassingly had some problems getting the imposter to run the ropes. He botched a big boot, and recovered by slamming the fake, elbow dropping him, and taunting Randy to come back to the ring. As the crowd got quiet, Hogan grabbed a microphone and told Orton that he could rest assured that this Sunday, Hulkamania would run wild on him…